The Monster Within
by wildbats
Summary: Sequel to Devil's Breath. A few months after Greg's ordeal, his life is going well until another serial killer comes to town. The case becomes very personal and plunges Greg and the other CSI's into tracking the killer down. Greg/Nick friendship
1. Chapter 1

**A/N- Hello everyone. Here is my follow up to Devil's Breath. Now I will try to update once a week if I can. This story picks up a few months after Devil's Breath left off. Let me know what you think of the start of it. Thanks for reading!**

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He stared down at the bloodied body while the Assistant Coroner, David Philips took the body temperature. "Based on the body temp, I would say time of death was 6 hours ago" David told the dark-blond haired CSI.

Greg looked around the area as the wind and sand blew away any possible footprints that might have remained from their suspect. "Six hours is plenty of time for our killer to be long gone by now." He looked back down at the naked woman's broken body and shook his head. "The ligatures on her wrists clearly show she was tied up and struggled against those restraints. She was probably sexually assaulted." He was unconsciously rubbing at the scars on his own wrist.

It did not go unnoticed by David though. "Uh, can I remove the body now?" He asked Greg, feeling it was better for him the less he saw the body, the less his memories of his own ordeal flooded his mind.

Greg's attention was diverted to the headlights he saw coming their way in the form of a Black Tahoe. "Yeah sure. I took enough photos already. I can fill in Nick now that he is finally here," he said with a nod toward the figure coming out of the SUV.

"Okay, then see you back at the lab." He and his assistant picked up the body and took it to their van.

Nick walked under the police tape and came towards Greg. "Hey sorry I am late. There was an accident on the highway that slowed me up. So I see Dave is already taking her body away. What's the word on it?"

Greg told him the preliminaries on the woman's body that was found off the highway in the desert.

"So a trucker saw her body out here as he went to take a leak in the desert," Detective Vartann said as he walked up to the two CSI's. "He called it in right away. I don't think he's our guy. He seems pretty shook up about finding the body. Nonetheless, we need to take a look inside his truck."

"I'll do it since you already started here, Greg," Nick said to him.

"Sure," Greg said before Nick walked off. He started searching the vicinity for anything that might be evidence in their case. He found very little. A few stray shoe prints he took molds of and some tire treads, all of which could have belonged to anyone.

After a couple hours of searching the desert area Greg and Nick headed back to the lab. Upon arriving back to the lab and dropping off their evidence, they headed to the autopsy room to see their victim.

"Nick, Greg, you're just in time," Doctor Robbins, the chief medical examiner said to them as they entered the room where their female victim laid out on an autopsy table before them.

"What do you have for us, Doc?" Nick asked the older man.

"Well your cause of death is the obvious blood loss due to the stab wound in her chest, but I can also tell you she was sexually assaulted. David just took the SAE kit to Wendy. I want you to take a look at these marks," he pointed them out.

Nick looked closer. "Looks like cigarette burn marks," he said upon examining them closer.

"And check out her back," Doc Robbins said as he turned her over.

Greg tensed up seeing her back but did not say anything. It was Nick who spoke. "Looks like she was given a lashing too."

Doc Robbins nodded. He glanced at Greg briefly, who was just staring silently at the markings. Then he turned his attention back to the body before him. "They had some time to scab up, so I am guessing they are a couple days old."

"So they might have happened previous to the rape?" Nick asked him.

"Can't be sure about that. It looks like she may have been raped multiple times. It's possible she was being tortured for a couple of days."

"Once we have her ID'd we can find out how many days she had been missing. That might tell us how long she suffered," Greg finally said.

Doc Robbins and Nick both looked at him, knowing how hard this had to be for him. It had only been five months since his kidnapping, torture, and rape. He still saw his psychiatrist once a week and was still on anti-depressants.

He noticed the both of them staring at him. "I'm okay, guys. Just gives me the chills a little bit knowing what she must have gone through." He shrugged.

"Okay, G. Well, let's hope we can find the creep who did this," Nick said.

"She did fight back. We found skin under her nails, also been turned into Wendy," Doc told them.

"So we may get a lead on our suspect then," Greg said eagerly.

"Perhaps. Anything else for us, Doc?" Nick asked him.

"That's about it for now."

After they left the autopsy, Nick stopped a moment to talk to Greg. "Are you going to be okay working this case?" He asked out of concern for his friend.

Greg sighed. He knew Nick meant well, but he still got irritated by the concern that he could not handle doing his job if a case came too close to comfort for him. "I said I will be fine, Nick. Have I done anything lately to make you doubt me again?"

Nick knew he should have kept his mouth shut now. He knew Greg was more defensive about himself. "No, Greg. I'm just being a good friend and wanting to make sure."

"I can work this case. I want to work this case," Greg told the dark haired Texan.

"Okay, okay. Then let's get back to work on the evidence we have," he said with a pat on Greg's back.

Greg grinned. "Cool."

*****

He walked in quietly and locked the door behind him. He stepped silently into the bedroom. He watched her sleeping soundly under the covers. She looked like an angel. He had needed an angel and she was the one.

He slipped over to the side of the bed and sat down gently on it. He brushed a dark strand of hair away from her face. She opened her eyes suddenly jerking away from the sudden touch.

"Hey, sorry. I didn't mean to scare you. I just could not resist staring at you," he smiled warmly at her.

She relaxed and touched his hand upon seeing her tired boyfriend. "You had a late shift. Why don't you come to bed?" She asked him as she patted the side of the bed.

"I will. I just want to take a shower first, then I will be in bed beside you." He leaned down and gave her a tender kiss. "You can go back to sleep. You don't have to wait for me to get out of the shower," he told her before he left the bedside.

Her green eyes followed his backside as he walked off to the bathroom. "But I like waiting for you to fall back to sleep with," she said before he closed the door.

He turned around and gave her a 1000-watt smile. "I like falling asleep with you, too. See you in a few minutes."

She lay back against the pillow. She could not believe her luck still in finding such a great guy in Greg Sanders. After meeting him while he was in the hospital and then attending their group therapy sessions, she never thought he would get comfortable enough around her to the point where they were now.

It was four months now since they first met. It was about a month ago when they decided on staying over at each other's places, trading off every week. They still were not willing to give up their own places yet, so they shared time between them. This week it was his place. They had keys to each other's place.

They had both found comfort in each other after horrific attacks and realized how much they had in common, emotional wise due to those attacks. Physically, Greg was having a harder time dealing with his scars still, but he had become comfortable enough around her to have physical contact.

She looked up and smiled when he stepped out of the bathroom. He wore pajama bottoms and a simple blue t-shirt. His short hair was towel-tussled dry. He offered her a sheepish smile as he looked at her. To her, he looked so damn sexy just standing there.

"Get over here," she said to him. He came over and pulled back the covers and crawled into bed next to her. "How was work today?" She asked him as he wrapped his arms around her.

"Rough case. I rather not talk about it. Instead…" he nuzzled her neck and started kissing down it. "I rather kiss you." He placed his lips on hers as she turned her head towards him. He held her face in his hands as they deepened their kiss.

She eventually unlocked lips with his and stared into his big brown eyes. "I thought you were tired?" She smirked.

He smiled in return. "I am. I just needed a nice goodnight kiss since you were still awake."

"Hmm, okay then. Let's get some sleep before we oversleep and end up running late for our jobs," she said to him.

He nodded and wrapped his arms around her. "Okay. Goodnight Marie."

"Goodnight Greg," she said as she snuggled into his embrace and closed her eyes.

She woke up a few hours later to his thrashing and incoherent mumbling in his sleep. He had not had many nightmares since they started sharing their beds at night. Same with her, but this seemed worse than his more recent ones. She lightly touched him. "Greg, Baby. You're having a nightmare again. Wake up."

After she shook his arm, his eyes flew open. "Greg?" He realized he was in his bed and turned toward the familiar voice. He looked at her concerned face and sighed, rubbing his hand over his face. "Sorry I woke you," he apologized.

"No, it is okay. Are you okay? You were really thrashing about this time. Does it have anything to do with this recent case you are working on?" She asked him.

He gazed at her sweet, understanding face before nodding his head a little. He turned on his back and stared up at the ceiling. "Yeah, I guess it does. It is a murder involving sexual assault of this young woman found naked in the desert."

"Oh," she said softly, having some of her own painful flashbacks.

"Yeah, it appears she was tortured prior, some kind of whip lacerations on her back," he said quietly. She now understood fully why it brought on nightmares for him. She reached over and placed her hand on his chest.

"Sometimes I don't understand how you can still do that job," she said as she ran her hand over his t-shirt. He looked over at her. "To help find the creeps and freaks out in this world that do those kinds of things and give some peace to the families left behind," he told her with sincerity in his eyes.

She smiled at him. "Have I told you lately what a wonderful man you are?"

He grinned. "Hmmm, probably but I could always stand to hear it again," he said as he ran his hand through her hair.

"Well, how about I show you instead?" She said as her hand traveled under his shirt. She leaned over and kissed him. Her hand fingered one of his nipples. She grinned when he gasped at her pinching him. She knew he was more sensitive to touches like that since he was tortured, but she also knew he trusted her and liked it when she did it.

She moved to straddle him. His eyes followed her hands as she pulled her nightgown over her head and tossed it to the ground. She saw lust fill his brown eyes as his hands came to rest on her hips.

When his hands started to travel upward, she stopped him. "No, you know the rules. I strip down means so do you."

He rolled his eyes at her and then sat up just enough and let her pull his shirt off. It had begun as a mutual trust issue between them but even though now they completely trusted each other, she still insisted on it. She knew that he was still super self conscious about the scars that littered his body but to her it was what made him even more beautiful. His ability to share his deepest, darkest secrets with her made her love him more.

She smiled as he lay back down. She leaned over his body and started kissing all of his scars. He closed his eyes and let himself get lost in the sensation of her warm breath over his skin. The first time she ever attempted to do this to him, he about had a panic attack because his mind would always take him back to the cold basement floor and the face of Robin Weaver taunting him before she took out her anger on his body. But once Marie told him to focus on her face and how he was feeling at that moment, he managed to be able to find that pleasure in life again.

She heard him moan as she teased his nipple with her teeth. She felt his hands slid down from her waist to her hips, pulling her panties down her thighs. Her mouth traveled down his lean torso, stopping just north of his waistband. She placed her hand over his crotch and then saw him shake his head, sort of sadly. She frowned a brief moment but then grinned. "You know that won't stop me."

His eyes followed her hands as they pulled down his boxer briefs. She looked at him and could read the disappointment in his soulful eyes. "It's okay, Baby," she said softly to him. Nonetheless she gave him some pleasure even though he was not hard.

He rolled her onto her back and pleasured her with kisses and his fingers. They eventually ended up embracing each other again, with Marie running one hand through his hair as she laid her head on his chest.

"You feeling okay?" He asked her. She raised her eyes to him in questioning. "Why wouldn't I be? I got you," she smiled at him.

"You know what I mean. I feel bad I can't give you everything," he sighed.

She raised herself up on her elbow to look at him better. "This relationship has never been about sex. Heck, we've only been intimate for about a month now. You know this runs deeper than that for me."

He pushed the hair out of her eyes. "What did I ever do to deserve you?"

"I'm not sure but you must have done something right," she grinned.

"Gosh, I love you," he said without thinking as he stared into her expressive eyes. Those eyes ended up opening up wider. "What did you just say, Greg Sanders?"

He suddenly realized what he said. He had never said those three words to her before. He was a bit taken back by it himself. "Uh, I said I love you." His eyes softened. "You are the light I never thought I would have again in my life." He watched as her eyes moistened up.

"Oh Greg!" She planted a firm kiss on his lips. She pulled back and looked at him. "I feel the same way. I love you too."

He pulled her in closer to him and kissed the top of her head. He did not realize how relieved he felt to hear her say she felt the same about him. It made him feel all warm inside.

After a few quiet, reflective moments, he spoke again. "We should probably try to get a bit more sleep before we have to be up, since I woke us early due to my nightmare."

"Yeah, sounds good to me. Just no more bad dreams, you hear me?" She said with a teasing threat in her voice.

"I'll do my best, boss," he chuckled before he closed his eyes again to try to sleep and this time he did not dream at all, just slept.


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N-Thanks for the reviews so far Yoshimara, Maria-Elric05, and 101spacemonkey. Unfortunately, if you have read my stories before you know they pretty much center around Greg angst of some sort, so expect that from this is all I will say for now. But for now the search for the killer continues...  
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With a cup of coffee in hand, Greg headed straight for the DNA lab once he got into work. Wendy looked up upon seeing him enter his former lab. "Hey, your results just came in," She said to him as she walked over with a sheet of paper to meet him.

"Has Nick come in yet?" He asked her as she handed him the DNA results.

She looked over his shoulder. "Here he comes," she smiled.

Nick came into the lab, smiling at Wendy. "Hello. So do we know who our victim is and our killer?"

"Yes on one and no on the other," she responded.

Greg turned around to face Nick, the results in his hands. "It looks like our victim is a Jennifer Fanning, age 29. No match on the male DNA."

"Jennifer was reported missing five days ago," Wendy added, looking at her computer screen.

"And no match for our killer," Nick frowned as he looked at the results Greg handed to him.

"No, sorry. He's not in CODIS," Wendy told them.

"Well at least we know who she is now. We can inform the family," Greg said somberly. He looked back at Wendy. "Thanks for the quick results."

Next after telling Detective Vartann who their victim was they went to the Trace Lab. "Got anything on our case?" Nick asked him.

David Hodges turned away from his computer and looked dully at the two CSI's. "When do I ever not get you your results?"

Greg rolled his eyes, but kept quiet, not in the mood to battle wits with him.

"Get on with it," Nick groaned.

The snarky lab tech stood up and waved his hand at them to follow him to the microscope. "Take a look for yourself."

Nick looked down first but did not know what it was. Greg looked next. It looked familiar to him. He lifted his head and looked at Hodges. "Is this liquid latex?"  
Hodges raised his eyebrows in surprise; not thinking the young CSI would know it. "Why yes, Sanders, it is. You've experienced the stuff?"

Greg smirked and looked at Nick. "Old case. I think Nick remembers." Nick slowly nodded.

"Ah yes, I do remember. So this was found on her body?"

Hodges nodded. "Doc Robbins gave me the sample. It was found on her back and in her vaginal track."

Nick looked at Greg with a questioning look. "A Lady Heather connection, perhaps?"

Greg shrugged. "Possibly. The stuff is popular though but we can check it out."

"Anything else, Hodges?" Nick asked him.

"The other stuff I presume you already are aware of. Sand, dirt, and gravel, all commonly found in the desert."

"Yeah, I guess so. Thanks," Nick said to him.

They walked down the hall. "Do you suppose we should fill in Grissom on the liquid latex and see if he can talk to Lady Heather about it?" Greg asked him.

He shrugged. "It can't hurt. Let's head to his office now."

Grissom was reading a report when they walked in. He looked over the top of his glasses at them. "What can I do for you two?"

"The case we are working on. We think there may be a Lady Heather connection with our case," Greg said to him.

"Yeah, there was liquid latex found on our victim's body. It reminds me of that case when we first discovered about her place," Nick told him.

Grissom took off his glasses and looked thoughtfully. "Did the victim work for her?"

"We aren't sure yet. Vartann is doing the work on that right now. But maybe she was a client or our killer was," Greg said.

"What do you know about the killer?" He asked them.

Nick looked to Greg before speaking. "Well, unfortunately not much at all."

"Have their been any similar cases recently?"

Greg shook his head. "Nope, none that we found."

"Well, let's not jump ahead of ourselves. Let's find out more about our victim. Perhaps an ex-boyfriend or current one before we question Lady Heather," Grissom advised them.

"Sure, okay," Nick said.

After leaving Grissom's office, they both went to the break room. Greg grabbed another cup of coffee while Nick went for a soda. They both sat down with their files in front of them.

"We need to get with Vartann and see what he found out about Jennifer Fanning," Nick said. He noticed Greg staring at the photos of the victim's back, the lacerations on it.

"Greg?" He said a couple of times before he looked up seemingly stunned.

"Huh?" He said, blinking.

"You were staring at her photos again. Are you sure you can handle working this case?" He asked out of concern.

"No, I'm fine. I was looking at them trying to figure out what might have caused them. It does not look like a standard whip mark. Maybe something wider was used, like a belt," he surmised.

Nick motioned for him to hand over the photos. He examined them more closely. "You know, I think you are right." He looked at Greg. "So that sort of takes us into a wider window of suspects. Most people own belts. We can maybe see who sells liquid latex in town here and try that."

Greg frowned. "You can buy it online too. Unless we can get some idea of who we are looking at, that is a long shot."

Nick sighed. After a few moments he looked at Greg, who seemed in better spirits today. "So how are things between you and Marie?" He asked with a grin.

Greg smiled. "It's good, really good. You know I still can't believe I got someone like her in my life just when I needed her."

"So are you still hopping between each others places?"

Greg nodded. "Yep, this week is my place."

"You two should just find a new place in between both jobs and just move in together. I mean, you two seem pretty serious," Nick said to him.

"Yeah we are. Well, I guess I am. She gives me something to look forward to everyday. She really helped me realize that I was not alone. But mostly it is that she accepts me for who I am now, accepts me body and soul," he said, reflectively.

Nick smiled. "Well if anyone deserves happiness, it is you, G, after all you have been through."

Greg's ears turned pink. "Thanks Nick. You know, honestly, when I start to remember those things I went through back then, I try to think of Marie and her smile and I feel good again."

"Whatever works, I say," Nick chuckled.

They finished up their drinks and then got in touch with Detective Vartann. He filled them in on more of their victim's background.

She worked at the MGM Grand as a waitress in one of their restaurants. She recently broke up with her boyfriend, according to her parents. Vartann already called in for a search warrant of his place. Billy Watts was his name and he supposedly had no alibi for the evening she went missing.

Finally they had a possible lead to follow up on. They did not get the search warrant until early morning, so that meant they were pulling overtime. Greg called Marie's cell and left a message for her that he would not be home for quite a while and to stay at her place if she wanted.

Detective Vartann and a uniformed officer went ahead of the two CSI's to present the search warrant. Billy Watts was 31 years old and looked much older when he opened the door. His black, curly hair looked unkempt as with the rest of him. His eyes were bloodshot as if he had been crying at some point.

"Mr. Watts, we have a search warrant to go through your place," Vartann said as he held it up in front of the man.

"Is this because I have no alibi? I would never kill her. I still loved her even though she broke up with me. I would never hurt her," he told them.

"Well if you have nothing to hide, then our search should not be a problem," Vartann said.

Mr. Watts sighed and then opened the door fully for them to come in.

Nick and Greg took separate rooms to go through. They collected various things but nothing really pointed to him being their killer.

It took them a couple of hours to go through the whole place. By the time Greg made it home he was dead tired. He walked into his bedroom and was surprised to see Marie sleeping in his bed. He had not paid attention when he parked his car. He clearly missed seeing her car there.

He managed to take his shower and slide into bed without waking her up. He gazed lovingly at her a moment before placing a kiss on her head. She stirred a little in her sleep but did not wake up.

He smiled and laid his head back and closed his eyes, quickly falling asleep.

He woke up several hours later to see Marie gazing at him with a big smile on her face. "Good evening. What time did you finally get home? I did not hear you," she said to him.

He raised himself up on his elbow. "I got home around 10 am. You were sound asleep. I did not want to wake you, you looked so peaceful and beautiful," he smiled and then leaned in and gave her a kiss.

She wrapped her arms around him and started placing kisses on his neck. "When do you have your next day off?" She asked as she nibbled down his neck.

"Mmmm, tomorrow," he moaned as she started running her hand under his shirt. She stopped suddenly and lifted her head. "Really? I'm off too. We hardly ever get the same days off lately."

He looked up at her as she ended up straddling him. "So do you have something in mind?" He asked with a devilish grin and a flicker of his eyebrows.

She lightly slapped his arm. "Not that type of idea, at least not to start the night. I was thinking we could try to go to a show or something. We rarely go out."

He frowned. "Can't we just sit home, do take out and rent some movies?"

She scowled at him. "We always do that. Greg, it's been long enough since your face was in the news. No one will even remember you from all that. You have to stop being so sensitive to being out in public. I'm over it now. Come on, just this once, please!" She pouted and blinked her green eyes at him.

He sucked on his bottom lip, contemplating her idea. He knew she was right. "Okay, we'll do something. You make the plans, since you obviously have something in mind."

She squealed a little in excitement and planted a big kiss on his lips. "Thank you so much. We'll have a great time, you will not regret it."

He ran his hands down her arms. "As long as I am with you, I'm sure I won't."

As he drove into work a few hours later, he was still smiling at how excited Marie was. They had managed to get tickets to Cirque Du Soleil: Love. They both loved The Beatles music and both wanted to see that show. Greg just hoped work did not get in the way of their plans.

He was grabbing a cup of coffee when Nick came into the break room. "Hey Greg, we have to meet Brass out at a scene. Another dead girl," he told him with a frown.

They were quiet as they drove out to the desert scene. When Nick stopped the SUV, Greg finally spoke up. "This is only a few miles from where we found Jennifer Fanning's body. Do you think they could be related?"

"Well, I think by what Brass said, it might be. Let's take a look for ourselves," Nick said.

Greg nodded and followed the older CSI into the desert. David Philips was examining the woman's body. He looked up and saw the two CSI's. "Hey guys, our Vic has been dead at least 12 hours. Stab wound to the heart looks like manner of death." He held up one of her arms. "Ligatures on her wrists." He turned her over partially. "Similar markings on her back as to your last victim."

Greg sighed heavily. "So we might have a serial killer on our hands again."

Nick looked at him with some sympathy, knowing Greg's last serial killer case turned out to be his worst experience ever being he was a victim. Nick had worked another serial since that time, but he knew this one had to be too close for comfort for Greg. "Yes it does but we will find this creep."

Greg's serious eyes met Nick's. "Yes we will."

Brass came over to the two CSI's. "Our victim was found by two hikers, Carly and Mike Gibbs. They were camping out here and went for a moonlight hike and found our Vic here. They called it in immediately. Luckily there is cell phone service out here, go figure."

"Thanks Jim. We'll see what we can find out here but I doubt it will be much. If she was dumped out here hours ago, most of the evidence is probably gone by now," Nick said to him.

"Well do what you can. I'm going to go through missing persons in the last 24-72 hours and see if I find our girl. I'll let you know if I do." They got to work once Super Dave took the body away.

"There are so many footprints. They could be the hikers or our killer's. I'll try to make some casts of them before they disappear," Nick said.

Greg nodded and then started walking down the road. He looked at the various tire tracks and took photos of them.

"He brings them out here where he knows no one is bound to find them for awhile. Only people that come this way are truckers or campers. He knows Vegas pretty well," Nick yelled over to Greg as he went over the scene.

Greg saw some fluid on the road not far from where the body was dumped. He took a photo of it before bending down to get a closer look at it. He took out a swab and swabbed it. He brought it up to his nose to sniff it. "His car maybe leaking antifreeze," he yelled out to Nick. He got up and started following faded footprints back to where their body was found.

He looked up at Nick. "I think he stopped the car over there and took out the body and dumped it over here. Just far enough off the roadside for regular vehicles driving by to miss the body."

"Well, the two girls have been fairly light weights. If he is strong enough, they would be easy enough to carry this little ways," Nick guessed.

After a bit longer they were ready to head back to the lab.

"So your off tomorrow. Got any plans?" Nick asked Greg on the drive back to the lab.

Greg had been staring out the window, thinking about the case. He turned to Nick when he asked. "Yeah Marie and I are going to the Cirque show 'Love.' Her idea," he grinned when he saw the smirk Nick gave him.

"Aww the lovebirds are going to see Love," Nick laughed.

"Shut up, you're just jealous because you have no girlfriend right now."

"Not true, I have a lunch date today with this hot little dental hygienist," Nick grinned.

Greg seemed amused. "No wonder you go to the dentist so much. So who asked whom out?"

"I asked her, if you must know. She said it was about time," he laughed some more.

"Good, then you can stop living vicariously through me," his friend chuckled.

"Well anyways enjoy the show. They are great, but you know that since you've seen one before." Greg nodded in agreement.

Once back at the lab, they paid a visit to Doc Robbins in autopsy. "Hello fellas. I don't have much to tell you. The MO is very much like your last victim. Apparent sexual assault and some lacerations on her back indicating she was whipped."

"Can I see those marks again?" Greg asked. "Sure." Doc turned her over on her side. Greg traced his finger over them.

"Looks wider again, like a belt." Doc nodded in agreement with him. "That would be my guess too. Also burn marks along her arm and a few on her chest, indication cigarette burns."

"So we are more and more looking at the same guy for both of these murders," Nick said.

"If I was to say, yes you would," Doc Robbins said.

They said thanks to him and then both headed to the break room for some coffee. They went over what they had so far when Brass found them.

"Hey guys, I've identified our newest victim. Her name is Holly Smith. She worked at the Laguna Lounge as a singer. She was reported missing yesterday when she had not reported to work two days in a row and no answer at her place. Last her colleagues knew was that it had been her day off. So that means she could have been grabbed 3 days ago."

"Didn't our other girl also disappear on or around her day off?" Nick asked.

"That would be correct. Also they only live a mile away from each other, both in nice apartment complexes. Ready to take a trip to her place?' Brass asked them.

They got their gear and were headed off again.

After searching her place and coming up with nothing significant, they were ready to end their shift. They were both heading to the locker room when Hodges found them.

"Hey, before you leave, I wanted to let you know there was traces of liquid latex found on your victim again."

Nick looked at Greg, frowning. "In her vaginal track too, like our last one?"

"That's what Doc Robbins said it was from. A liquid latex condom?" Hodges wondered with a disgusted look on his face.

Nick sighed. "Possibly. Thanks Hodges. We'll look into that avenue tomorrow."

Hodges nodded and left them. "You mean you will, I got a evening planned. If I cancel, she'll have my head," Greg smirked.

"Ah yes. Just me. I guess I will have to fill you in on Friday night then. Say doesn't Marie live near where we were tonight, at our victim's apartment?" Nick asked him.

"Yeah, just a few blocks away in Harvest Meadows. I might just talk her into moving in with me permanently now."

"That or find a whole new place to live in, like I said earlier. Anyway, let's get out of here. You have a great time tonight. I want to hear all about it," Nick said as he clapped his hand on Greg's shoulder.

"You too, enjoy your hot lunch date," he grinned before leaving his friend behind.

**Please review! :)**


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N-Thanks for all the reviews. Glad to see you are all liking it so far. Well some of you will not get what you want, unfortunately. But I think you will still enjoy the story. **

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"That show was amazing. I loved how they worked The Beatles music into their acts. I'm so glad we went," Marie boasted enthusiastically as they walked arm in arm out of the theater.

Greg smiled widely, feeling happy just to have the night alone with her. "Yeah, it really was great. Want to grab something to eat now?"

"Yeah, I am rather hungry. Do you have a place in mind?" She asked him as she leaned her head on his shoulder.

Greg just grinned at her as they walked through the Mirage. He had made reservations earlier based on when they would be out of the show. They went to Kokomo's and both had seafood dishes.

Greg was toying with his chocolate mousse when Marie noticed something was on his mind. He had not said much during the meal. She had done most of the talking. She reached across the table and laid her hand on his. "What's wrong, Greg?"

He looked up at her with a sad smile on his face. "I'm sorry. Just got this case on my mind."

"Is it that girl found out in the desert, raped and murdered?' She asked him. She had seen it on the news.

He stared at her. "We found another one last night, looks like the same guy did it. They both lived near your place. I think you should stay at my place until we catch him," he told her.

She was touched by his concern. "Greg, I'm careful since my attack. I still have to go to my place to change clothes and get things occasionally."

"Well, maybe we should find a whole new place, midway between our jobs and just move in together, for good," he proposed to her out of the blue.

"Uh, well is this just coming from this case?" She asked, uncertain of his reasons.

"Actually, it is something I've been thinking about for a few days since Nick brought it up. Look it makes sense and saves money from keeping up two places," he said, trying to justify it.

She chewed on her bottom lip a moment. "I suppose it does make some sense."

"I mean unless you really do not want to move in with me." He gave her his puppy dog eyed look.

She shook her head and smiled. "You know how that look melts me. Of course I want to live with you. You're the best thing that has ever happened to me."

"I feel the same way about you. So what do you think?" He asked with hopeful eyes.

"I think the next time we have some time off together, we should look at places to live."

Greg broke into a mega-watt smile. "Great!"

They finished their meal and headed home for the rest of their night.

Greg was sitting on the sofa, sipping a glass of wine he poured. One more sat on the table for Marie. She stepped into the bedroom for a moment. He was programming his iPod to play on the iHome when she walked back in wearing nothing but a sheer purple negligee and purple panties that he could see under the sheer material. His mouth dropped open seeing her. He set down his wine glass on the side table as she sauntered over to him and sat on his lap. He ogled her body, taking in her beauty. "When…when did you get this?" He asked as he fingered the flimsy fabric.

"I bought it before I went to work last night, in anticipation for tonight. So you like?" She asked with a devilish glint in her eyes that stood out even more green against the purple fabric.

"Oh yeah I like," he panted, practically.

She looked him over and sighed. "Once again, Greg Sanders, you have too many clothes on. Let me help you out of them."

He was going to let her do anything she wanted to him because he was far too mesmerized gazing at her. She put her hands on his t-shirt hem and pulled it up over his head, with some assistance from him. She smiled a little. "That's a bit better, but I still think you need to loose the jeans."

He nodded and watched as she slid off of him to help pull off his pants, only leaving his boxers on. She looked at him far more satisfied now that he only had on one article of clothing left on. She grinned when she noticed the bulge in his shorts getting bigger.

She settled back down on his lap, purposely grinding herself against him. She grinned again when she felt his body react.

"I, uh, poured some wine for us," he stammered as he reached over for her glass to hand her. She took a sip out of it and then proceeded to put her fingers into it. She took them out and pressed them against his lips. His mouth, sucking on them, quickly devoured them.

His hands went under her negligee and soon were cupping her breasts. When his thumbs found her rosy buds, she threw her head back and ground against him harder.

His hands on her felt so amazing but she wanted him to feel pleasure too. She refocused on the wine and took the glass and dripped some down his chest. He watched her in a haze as she licked up the wine off his chest. She focused on his taught nipples, causing him to moan under her. She lavished his chest while his hands worked her breasts. She was so hot and ready for him; she hoped he was ready for her this time, because she wanted him inside her.

He noticed she stopped kissing his chest. She leaned back some and put her hands on the waistband of his shorts. "I think you're ready tonight, babe," she said as she gazed lovingly at him.

He wanted her so badly. He wanted to show her how much he loved her. "I love you, Marie," he breathed heavily.

She smiled, "I know."

****

He held her tight in his arms, kissing the top of her head. "I wish it could be like this all the time," he said to her softly.

She looked up at him. She was lying on top of him on the sofa, both naked and sweaty under a blanket. "I'm okay with it not being this way all the time. I know it's not your fault. I know you would be ready for me all the time if you could. Our relationship had never been and never will be about sex. It's about two damaged souls who found comfort and understanding in each other at the most difficult time in our lives."

"When did you become so wise?' He chuckled softly.

"Hmmm, when I met you," she replied with a grin. She snuggled back against his chest.

They were quiet for a while before Greg, who had been thinking about something decided to ask. "Can I ask you something?"

"Sure, babe, anything."

"Were you like this before your attack or do you act differently now?" He asked in almost a whisper.

She lifted her head and looked at him seriously. "Why do you ask? Do you think you have changed since your ordeal?"

He shrugged as he stared up at the ceiling. "I have, I know it. I'm more reserved about things. I'm more sensitive about many things; cautious, things like that. What about you?"

She gazed at him and ran her hand through his hair. "Yeah, I guess more or less the same as you said. I will say around you I feel most like my old self."

He looked at her, surprised. "Yeah, really?"

"Yes really. I feel safe with you. I know you would never let anything happen to me."

"Not if I can help it." He was quiet for a moment. "Do you wonder if he is still out there, maybe doing the same to others?"

She laid her head back down, not wanting to look at him, not wanting him to see her fear still. "I know he is still out there. If he has done to others what he did to me, I do not know. I have not kept up with the news from home."

"Hmmm," was his only response.

"Say, isn't Robin Weaver's trial in a few weeks?" She asked him. She felt him tense up. "Sorry, I should not have said anything."

He shook his head. "No, it is okay. I will have to prepare for it in a few weeks anyway. It will be all in the news again. I'll be okay though. She does not have that power over me anymore. She was wrong about me," he mused.

"Yes, she was." She looked into his big brown eyes and smiled. "I think we should get cleaned up and go to bed. Back to work tomorrow."

He groaned. "Must we? Can't we just sleep here?"

"I did not think you wanted to wake up with a sore back," she smirked.

"Ah, good point," he mumbled. She sat up. "Last one to the shower is a rotten egg." She got up and sprinted to the bedroom. He just grinned and slowly made his way there.

*****

Greg was walking down the hallway, sipping his coffee when Nick found him. "Hey, how did last night go?"

"It was great," he said with a huge grin. "We talked about moving in together too," he added.

"And she went for it?" Greg nodded his response. "Sweet, Greggo," Nick replied with a pat to his back.

"And what about you? How was the lunch date?"

"We will be seeing each other tomorrow again," Nick smiled brightly.

"Ahh, good to hear. Now back to reality. What did you find out yesterday about our case?"

Nick had the case file in hand. "Well, I did some research on the liquid latex angle. You were right that there are a few stores in town that sell the stuff, but I decided to narrow it down to the area nearest where our victims were from. There is only one store in that area. I checked it out. The owner says he has sold only one silver-colored liquid latex in the last month and it was bought with cash. He could not remember who it was. So if this is the same guy, he probably lives near this location."

"What about the drop off locations? They are along the same stretch of highway. Maybe this guy is a trucker and takes that route. There are motels near the victim's homes. Maybe he stays there," Greg suggested.

Nick sighed. "Good point but now our box just got bigger again. We need more than what we got. We do not even know how he grabs our girls."

"I might be able to help," Henry said as he came up to them. They both gave him their attention.

"There were traces of Propofol in Holly Smith's blood. I asked Doc Robbins if there was any needle marks. He rechecked and found one in the neck. Look," he held out a photo, accentuating the little needle mark in her neck.

"So he is subduing them first. And where is he picking them up? At their homes, outside somewhere?"

Nick glared at Greg. "There you go again, making the box bigger."

"Hey, I am just saying we still know so little. There are so many variables right now," he tried explaining to him.

"Okay, I know. Henry, how easy is it to get this stuff?" Nick asked.

"Only in hospitals or certain doctors would have access to it," he told them.

"I can contact Marie and maybe she can tell me who might use it at Desert Palms," Greg suggested.

"It's better than nothing. Try it out. I'll see if any of our victims have been to a doctor recently," Nick told them.

They went about their research only to narrow down their search minimally. Both women had recent visits to doctor's offices right by Desert Palms Hospital. The problem was they were completely different days and completely different office buildings near the hospital.

"Okay so what do our vics have in common so far?" Greg asked Nick as they had the case files open in front of them.

"Well, first of all they all live in the same 1 mile radius. They seemed to be grabbed during the day."

"Yeah and no one noticed, which still seems odd to me," Greg added.

"The guy was careful. He made sure no one was around to notice when he grabbed them. Perhaps he knew both of them, so his being around did not seem odd," Nick theorized.

"Okay that is possible. Back to similarities. Both victims are close in age and looks. Both pretty brunettes, both visited doctors near Desert Palms Hospital recently. Anything else?" Greg asked Nick.

Nick looked at him and frowned. "Not really, that pretty much covers it."

Greg sighed. "Well the tire tracks found at both of our scenes seem to come from a SUV or a Van of some type."

"One with a radiator leak, don't forget." Greg rubbed his hands over his face. "Nothing solid though to point to our guy though."

"But we do have his DNA, so once we get a possible suspect, we compare DNA and we got him," Nick reminded him.

Grissom walked into the room. "How is the case coming along, fellas?"

They went over everything they had on the cases so far with him. Grissom looked over the evidence. "The guy is careful and smart. He covers his tracks pretty well," Grissom mused.

"Yes he does," Nick agreed.

"Well, for now, unless some new evidence comes up I'm going to put you two on another case. We have a possible arson case at a bar off the strip."

On the drive out to the scene, Nick noticed Greg had been quiet. He looked over at him and saw his eyes closed, leaning against the headrest.

"You doing okay there, G?" He asked with concern.

He kept his eyes closed as he responded. "I've got a migraine brewing."

"Are you going to be okay working the case?"

"Yeah, I'll take my pills when I get there. I've got them in my kit."

Nick knew he still suffered some affects from his abduction and torture; migraines were the most common he knew of. He occasionally missed a shift if he had a really bad one.

"Her trial is in a few weeks, isn't it?" Nick asked.

Greg did not have to have Nick mention the name, he knew who he was referring to. "Yeah, I am trying not to think about it right now. I know I'll be stressed out enough once it starts with all the coverage it is going to get," he sighed.

"I thought you were over her control of you?" Nick asked him.

"That's not it at all. It's the possibility of having to relive the whole thing again by seeing them talk about her and what she did and then the possibility of having to testify in front of a jury. That's what I am hoping will not happen."

"Ah, I got ya. Well maybe it won't come to that. Hopefully they will not need you to testify in person."

"I hope not. I was told I should not have to, but you never can be sure."

They worked the small bar arson efficiently, finding hints of gasoline as the accelerant. They still ended up getting back to the lab late. Greg still had his migraine but it was not too bad. He wished he could go straight home to bed but it was time for his once a week visit to see his psychiatrist, Dr. Mark Rayon.

He walked into his doctor's office and checked in with the desk clerk. He was just finishing a text message to Marie, saying he missed her, when he was called in.

He walked into the familiar ocean blue colored office. "Hello Greg. How are you today? You look a little pale," the older, graying Doctor said to him as he held out his hand for him to shake it.

"Yeah, I got a bit of a migraine still hanging on. I took my meds already," he said after shaking the doctor's hand and then taking a seat in the big cushy chair.

"Oh, I'm sorry to hear that. Well, I'll try to keep this short then. So how are you? Anything you want to talk about?" He studied his patient's reaction carefully, trying to read him.

After his typical shrug, he looked down at his jeans and started playing with the fabric. "We seem to have a serial killer who has been targeting women and sexually assaulting them and uh, whipping them and burns too."

Dr. Rayon pursed his lips, knowing why Greg was bringing this up to him. "It's causing the memories of what happened to you to come back more again, isn't it?"

Greg nodded. "Yeah. I can't help it. A couple of my co-workers caught me dazing out, I guess you could say, when I saw the bodies."

"I give you a lot of credit, Greg, for going on with such a difficult job that you have. You have a lot of courage. It is natural for you to have moments where you lapse back into your own memories. You went through hell. You can sympathize with these victims to a point."

"I guess. I just still am uncomfortable with everyone worrying about me," he said as he finally looked at the doctor again.

"They are concerned about you, all people should be so lucky to have people so concerned about them," he smiled a little at him.

He sighed. "Yeah I know."

"How are things with you and Marie?"  
That had Greg form a smile. "We are good, really good. We've talked about moving in together."

"Wow, so soon?" Dr. Rayon said in surprise.

Greg frowned. "You think it is too soon? We've been dating for a few months now. Besides, we practically live together as it is now."

"I see. So your physical issues have not gotten in the way of your relationship?"

"No, that's why we work because she does not care," he replied defensively.

"Do you love her?"

"Yes," he replied. He noticed his doctor's skeptical look. "Why? Do you think I am not capable of loving someone?"

"No, not at all. I just do not want to see you jumping into something based on your intimacy fears?"

"Intimacy fears? Ask Marie, I do not think she things I have any," he smirked thinking about the night before.

Dr. Rayon could see he was referring to a real life moment. He smirked. "Okay, I'll leave that subject be for now. How are you otherwise? Her trial is coming up soon. Are you jittery about it?"

"Everyone has been bringing that up lately. I'm trying not to think about it but everyone will not help me do that. I am hoping I do not have to go on the stand."

"What if you do?"

He shrugged. "I will just have to deal with it, won't I?"

"Yes, you will and I think if you do, you will be fine," He watched the appreciative smile on Greg's face form.

"Thanks," he said before he yawned.

Dr. Rayon laughed. "Okay that's my cue to end this session. Go home and get some sleep. I'll see you next week."

Greg thanked his doctor and then gratefully drove home. When he got there, he saw a note from Marie on the kitchen counter.

_'Hello Lover. I know you had to see Dr. Rayon today so I decided to go back to my place. I have some errands to run today and a couple chores to do around my place. You can stop by later on if you want to, otherwise I will see you tomorrow. I love you. Love Marie.'_

Greg smiled to himself. He was almost tempted to go to her place but his migraine made him decide against it. He really needed to get some sleep.

TBC

_Review please...and thanks for reading!_


	4. Chapter 4

A/N-Thanks for the reviews. I'm glad those of you who are not OC fans like Marie enough in this story because I try to make new characters likable. I think a lot of you will not be too happy with this chapter but I still hope you will continue to read and review.

* * *

At work that evening, they still had no new leads on their killer, so they ended up working a new murder case. Midway through his shift Greg called Marie to see how work was going for her but he got her voice mail, which was normal since it was during her work hours. He left her a message that he missed her and he could not wait until he came home to her.

"Hey Greg, looks like we are pulling a double. Grissom just said the day shift had a couple of call outs, so we need to pull some of the case load," Nick said to him as he was in the locker room changing into his jacket about to go home.

"Seriously? Damn, well there go any romantic plans I had," he said with a smirk. He took out his cell phone to text a message to Marie, letting her know he would not be home.

"I know. I was supposed to have my second lunch date with my new girl. I have to change those plans too," Nick sighed.

"Well, at least Marie is use to me pulling doubles. Maybe she can pick up an extra shift at her job too," he said as he sent his message off.

"Yeah, well they are waiting on us; an armed robbery at a pharmacy. Let's get going."

Greg took off his jacket and exchanged it for his CSI vest and followed after Nick.

******

Greg stretched out in bed once he was at home. He was exhausted. Marie had texted him back earlier, saying she was working a double, so they would not see each other that day.

Greg hated sleeping alone. It was the second day in a row. He knew he would have nightmares again. He rarely had them when he shared his bed with her. He begrudgingly closed his eyes to drift off into sleep.

_The air was cold around him. He could feel the cold against his bare skin. He opened his eyes and he was back in the dimly lit cellar where Robin Weaver held him captive. He struggled to get up but he was tied down, unable to break free. He tried to scream for help but nothing came out of his mouth as he opened it up. His body ached and was covered in welts and bruises. He struggled again against his bindings when he suddenly heard her voice. _

_"Stop my silly Pet. No one can save you now." He cringed and closed his eyes, not wanting to look upon her face again. _

_"You're locked away. I am not here. Leave me alone," he said over and over again in his head._

_"Oh, but I will always be here, my Pet. Always in your head, always that little monster inside your head," she laughed cruelly. _

_"Stop, stop it!" He yelled, his voice suddenly coming to him._

_"Shhh, baby. It is okay, she can't hurt you while I am here," came a soft, sweet voice, sounding like an angel to him._

_He slowly opened his eyes again and saw her, a vision in white. "I'll always keep you safe, like you will keep me safe." She smiled down upon him._

_Suddenly he was curled up on plush bed, looking into those beautiful green eyes he loved so much. "We will keep each other safe," he told her as he ran a hand through her hair. She smiled sweetly at him._

_His head was suddenly jerked around hard to look into the demented hazel eyes he dreaded. "NO one can keep you safe forever." She held up a knife before his eyes and then jammed it into his chest._

He woke up in a cold sweat and quickly sat up and surveyed his surroundings. _It was just a dream, Greg. Keep it together._ He told himself as he tried to calm his rapidly beating heart by taking deep breaths. He looked at the empty space next to him in bed. "Shit, I really hate sleeping alone."

******

The shift was going slow. Greg kept yawning, as he did not get much sleep after his nightmare. He was eager to go home and hopefully have a good night sleep since Marie should be in bed with him. But his plans were dashed when they saw Brass come in to the CSI lab. "Guys, looks like you might be pulling another double. We have another dead girl off Highway 160 again. Meet me there. I'll send you the exact coordinates for your GPS."

Greg looked at Nick and sighed. "Let's get going."

Police lights flashed as they arrived at the desert scene. Greg walked under the police tape, with Nick right beside him. Brass was standing over the female body. David had not arrived yet.

"Near where our other two girls were found, about half a mile off from our last location," Greg said as they neared the body. As the body came into view, his heart almost stopped.

Nick noticed him slowing down to a stop. "Greg, what's…" he stopped when he saw what Greg saw.

"No," Greg said in a near whisper. His stomach started to twist as he looked down at the female face, now bruised and lifeless. He stared down in disbelief. "No, no, no, this is not real," he stammered."Shit," Nick said quietly behind him as he recognized the face of the woman Greg talked about so much; the woman he loved. Nick went to put his hand on Greg's shoulder when the younger man suddenly bolted away, running to the roadside where he proceeded to start vomiting.

Brass looked between the two of them, lost. "What's going on? You two know her?" He asked Nick.

Nick looked gravely at him. "It's Greg's girlfriend, Marie Somers."

"Oh Christ. No way. Poor kid. He can't catch a break," Brass said, shaking his head.

When Greg first caught a glimpse of her face, he thought he was dreaming. But as he got closer he knew it was her. He knew every inch of her and he knew it was Marie. Then his world crashed around him again, along with his stomach. He had to get away. He ran away to where he would not compromise the scene. Now he stood heaving on the roadside. This could not be happening, not his Marie. She could not be dead, not a victim to this sick bastard. She had been through hell before, why did she have to suffer again? His stomach revolted against him again as he thought about what she probably went through, being raped and tortured.

"Greg?" Nick came over and stood beside him once David arrived on the scene. Greg was still standing off to the side. He laid a hand on his shoulder. "I'm so sorry."

Greg was leaning over, his hands on his knees. He started shaking his head. "No, it's not her. It can't be. She's at work." It could not be her. He just could not bear the thought.

"Greg, come on. Why don't you go sit in the SUV for a bit?"

Greg suddenly straightened out and looked at him. Nick could see tears streaming down his cheeks. "No, no. I need to see her. I need to be with her. It's cold out here tonight. She's going to be cold. I need to warm her up. She'll be fine."

Nick bit his bottom lip, hating seeing his friend in denial and pain. "Come on then, let's go over there." Nick could feel him shaking under his hand as he led him over to where her body lay.

David was there. Brass had filled him in on who the victim was. David looked at Greg with pity.

"Do you have time of death, Dave?" Nick asked him quietly as he watched Greg stare at her.

"She's been dead about 2 hours."

"She was supposed to be at work. She texted me saying she was working a double. I don't understand," Greg mumbled.

Brass looked at him. "When did you receive the last text from her?"

Greg pulled out his cell phone to see when the last text was. "It was this morning at 10:05 am." Greg realized there was plenty of time in between when she could have been abducted. He felt sick again but held it down. He looked at her again, her naked body bruised and dirty; a single stab wound to her chest, the blood dried surrounding it.

"Can…can you c…. cover her, please?" He asked weakly.

Dave nodded. "Yes, I can do that." Dave got up and got a sheet out from his van.

Greg knelt down on the ground next to her. Her hair was a mangled mess. Her right eye was bruised along with her cheek. Her lips were bruised and bloodied. His beautiful Marie was now just another victim. He wanted to scream, to curse, to beat someone, but he held it in. He had to be professional otherwise they would pull him off the case and there was no way he was going to give up working on the case now. He moved a piece of her hair off her face.

Nick stepped away to call Grissom. "Hey Grissom, we have a situation. We know our latest victim."

"You do? Who is it?" He asked with concern in his voice. Nick looked back at Greg leaning over Marie's body. He shook his head. "It's Marie Somers, Greg's girlfriend. Christ, Grissom why her?" Nick asked even though he knew he had no answer. He heard Grissom's deep sigh.

"How is he holding up?"  
"After throwing up some, he seems to have control of his emotions overall, so far," he told him.

"I'll be there as soon as I can with Catherine. Stay at the scene until then," Grissom told him.

When Nick wrapped up the conversation, he saw David finally picking up her body, with Greg's help and putting it on a stretcher to put in the van. He came to stand beside Greg as they watched the Coroner's Van drive away with her.

"Hey, why don't you go to the SUV now? Grissom is coming out here to help finish up," Nick told him.

Greg's brown eyes were rimmed red with pain but deeper inlaid determination. "I am not being taken off this case now. I've been on this serial killer case from the start. This will not stop me. This will only make me more determined to find this piece of shit," he seethed.

"Greg, it's not up to me. It's up to Grissom," Nick told him.

"Well he is not here yet, so until them I am collecting evidence. I saw similar shoe prints over here," he told him as he walked over to the roadside. Nick followed him. Greg pointed a clear footprint out.

"Look, it looks like one we found at the last location."

Nick knelt down to get a better look at it. "You're right. I'll get a cast of it."

Greg stopped him from getting his kit. "No, let me. I need to keep myself busy. I need to work this."

Nick looked Greg in his eyes. The persistence was fierce now in those dark brown eyes. "Okay, okay Greg. I'll stand up for you on working this case, but I'm going to keep my eyes on you. I don't want you getting in too deep or getting too emotional."

"Thanks Nick, it means a lot," Greg said to him. He took a shaky breath before grabbing his kit to get what he needed to make the mold of the footprint.

As he worked, he could not help but see her lifeless body lying there. It just did not seem real to him. How could she be dead? Everything felt surreal. He was so lost in thought that he had not realized Grissom and Catherine had arrived on scene.

He jumped a bit when he heard his name called. He looked up and saw Grissom walking up to him. He picked up the gelatin mold of the shoe print to prove to Grissom he could still work the scene.

"Look, we found a print just like this at the last crime scene. This has to belong to our guy," he told Grissom even before Grissom had a chance to say anything.

He looked at the print and then looked at Greg. He could see the pleading in his eyes, even though nothing had been said. "Greg, you know by all means you should not be working this case," he finally said to him.

"Did you give up on my case, when you probably should have? You can't tell me you all were not personally involved in that?" He said stubbornly.

Catherine stepped up beside Grissom. "He is right, Gil. We were all emotionally involved in his case but we still worked it. I think he deserves the chance to keep working on this case." Catherine gave Greg a sympathetic smile.

"Thanks Catherine for seeing my side," he said gratefully. She could tell he was putting up a brave front though.

Grissom sighed. "Your point is made. You can work the case still but I reserve the right to pull you off of it if I feel you are compromising the case."

"Thank you, Grissom." Grissom took the imprint from Greg to put away in the SUV. He knew Catherine had wanted to talk to him alone. She had been so worried about him on the drive over.

She stepped over to Greg when Grissom stepped away. "I'm so sorry, Greg. How are you really doing?"

Greg closed his eyes and shook his head. "I still cannot believe it was her I saw laying there. I just …I just want to catch this guy." He rubbed his temples a bit and lowered his head. "I loved her, I really loved her," he said in almost a whisper.

Catherine gave him a hug. He tried not to, but could not stop the tears forming in his eyes.

Grissom went over to Nick and Brass, where her body had been found. They all looked and saw Catherine holding Greg.

"How's he holding up?' Grissom asked them.

Nick shook his head. "I'm not entirely sure, but better than I expected."  
"Well if he is still on his anti-depressants, they are probably working for him right now," Grissom said.

"So are you going to let him stay on the case?' Nick asked him.

"Yes, I am but I will be keeping a close eye on him. You do the same. After what happened last night, he needs to be watched," Grissom said as he looked at Greg breaking away from Catherine's embrace.

"Do you think we should notify Dr. Rayon?" Nick questioned his boss.

"I'll suggest to Greg to contact him and let him know. We don't want to step on Greg's toes right now."

"So catch me up on what you have on this scene so far?" He asked them, refocusing on the case.

"Thanks for your shoulder, Catherine," Greg said as he wiped at his eyes.

"I know what it is like to lose a loved one," she said softly. "I suppose you do." He put a hand to his head.

"Getting a migraine?" She asked, seeing him grimace.

He sighed heavily. "Yes, not surprising really. I just need to focus myself on working the case."

"Don't over do it, Greg. She would not want this to tear you apart."

"I know. It's just so…. unbelievable." He lowered his head.

"Are you going to contact her father?"

"Shit! I have not even met the man and I have to tell him he lost his only child now," Greg cursed.

"You do not have to. One of us could do it," she told him.

"No, he knows me. I mean we've talked on the phone and via the net before. At least he is not in Iraq anymore. It should be easier to reach him."

"Look, let me take you back to the lab, where you can rest a little and then you have a chance to call him. Grissom and Nick can finish up here. You can work on things back at the lab," she suggested.

He looked back at the others processing the scene. "I guess that would be fine."

"Okay, let me go tell Grissom. Why don't you get into our SUV and rest your eyes to chase away your migraine?"  
He nodded slightly. He was feeling too drained suddenly to argue.

She watched him carefully as he walked slowly to the Tahoe. Then she went to the others. "You got him to take a rest?" Nick asked in surprise.

"Yeah, he's getting a migraine. I told him I would take him back to the lab, where he can work on things from there. He's also going to notify her father."

"He has a lot to deal with. I just hope he can handle it this time around," Nick said, thinking back.

"Hate to interrupt, but I have a shooting scene to get to on the other side of town. I'll catch up with you at PD," Brass told them before he left.

After he was out of earshot, Catherine spoke. "Why are you so worried, Nick?"

"Oh, uh, he just was very stressed out after his abduction." He looked at Grissom, hating to hold back the truth about Greg's suicide attempt from last time.

"Well of course he was but he still handled it well, overall," She said in his defense.

Grissom met Nick's worried look and made a decision. "Catherine, there is something you should know. Only Nick, myself, and his doctor know of this. I know I can trust you to not tell anyone else. I think you need to know that Greg might not be as stable as he seems." He took a long pause before continuing. "Greg tried to kill himself the day after he first saw Robin Weaver again after his attack."

She gasped. "What? How?"

"He took a gun from the lab home. We happened to find out in time to see him on his bed, holding a gun to his head," Grissom told her.

"No. No, he would have never pulled the trigger though," she said, not believing it.

"If it was not for Nick tackling him at the right time, he would not be with us right now, Catherine."

She looked horrified at Nick, who nodded his head solemnly. "Oh my God! I had no idea. That's why he is still seeing his psychiatrist and on anti-depressants."

"Well also his doctor advised him that due to how long the drug was in his system, he would suffer some affects from it. His migraines are one thing but also his mental stability could be affected," Nick told her.

"He has not said this to anyone else but you two?" She asked, astonished.

"No, us, and Marie and his parents knew," Grissom told her.

Catherine shook her head in disbelief. "Why is all this happening to him? It's just not right. He was happy again."

"I know. It's not fair but the only thing we can do right now is support him and catch this serial killer," Grissom said sternly.

Catherine headed back to the car and got inside. As she did, she saw Greg in a completely different light. She could not fathom that he tried to kill himself only a few months ago.

Now he had his head turned, looking out into the dark night. She cleared her throat. "Ah, are you ready to go?"

"Yeah," he replied without turning his head to look at her.

She did not know what to say to him anymore, so she said nothing as she drove him back to the lab.

"They told you, didn't they?" He said out of the blue after having been on the road for a few minutes. She was shocked. "Uh, told me what?" she asked, trying to keep her voice calm as she stopped at a red light.

He turned and looked at her, his eyes were so full of sadness. "That I tried to kill myself," he said somberly.

She acted stunned. "What? No!"

"Don't bother lying Catherine. I saw you talking to them out there. I could tell by the way you kept looking back at me in here. And then when you came back, I just knew by your silence."

"Oh Greg! I am so sorry. They just felt it best if I knew this time. I swear I will not tell anyone else," she said with a thickness in her voice.

"The light is green," he said dryly.

She looked up and then heard a horn beep behind her. "Sorry," she said again as she pulled forward.

"I know they meant well in telling you. They want you to watch me for signs I might try it again. I won't. I'm not in that place. I just want to find the son of a bitch who killed her and the others. That's all I care about now."

She looked over at him and saw he was looking back at her with those sad eyes, but now she also saw a storm building in those big eyes. "We'll do our best to get him, you know that."

"I know." He looked back out the front window and closed his eyes as the bright glare of the oncoming car headlights burned into this head. She noticed this.

"Have you taken anything for the headache?"

"Yeah when I got in here, but it doesn't always work that good or fast," he commented.

"Maybe you should just go home," she suggested.

"No," he said quickly. "Home has too many memories of her and knowing she will not be coming home to me again. I…I cannot deal with that right now. Working is best for me." When he had been sitting waiting for Catherine that was the one thought that had come to him. He would never be sharing his bed with her again. She would never be home, eagerly awaiting him or vice versa. He could not think about that yet. He was going to find this guy and if he had to forgo sleep until then, he would. He was going to make sure this guy did his time.


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N-Apparently my killing of Marie did not thrill readers since I had fewer reviews. Sorry to those of you who wanted her to live but I live by my angst and drama in stories and her getting killed makes for better of those things. I do hope those of you who are still reading enjoy nonetheless. Thanks!**

* * *

Back at the lab, Greg did pass on going to Marie's autopsy. He could not handle seeing her like that so instead he made the dreaded call.

Catherine had told him he could use her office to make the call in private. After having to get transferred several times, he was put in touch with Major Somers.

"Hello Sir. This is Greg Sanders, Marie's boyfriend." He said, trying to keep his voice steady.

"Greg, yes. What are you doing calling me at such an early hour?" Then suddenly he realized something must be wrong. "Why are you calling? Has something happened to Marie?"

Greg could hear the fear in his voice. He felt his own throat constrict as he tried to tell him. "I'm sorry, Sir. She's dead."

There was silence for a moment and then he heard, "No, no…what happened? Did you have anything to do with this?" He sounded accusatory.

Greg wished, for a moment that the world would just swallow him up. "We found her body this evening in the desert," he said as his voice wavered.

"What happened? Do you know?" Her father asked over the phone.

"Uh…we've been investigating a serial killer here. She seems to be one of his victims." Greg did not want to go into many details if he did not have to. It was hard enough for him to talk about her like this.

"Was she…was she sexually assaulted?"

That was the question he was praying he would not ask. He had not been to the autopsy but he knew the past victims had and being she was found naked, he just knew. "I believe so. The past victims have been. He stabs them in the heart to kill them." His head felt like it might explode soon. He needed to double his meds.

"Have you seen her, then?" Her father's voice was quiet.

Greg was starting to feel sick to his stomach again, remembering recognizing her body as she lay there in the desert. "I was called out to the scene. I…I identified her." His voice was shaking as he spoke now.

"Greg, I'm sorry. I know she loved you."

"Thanks," was all he managed to say.

"When will her body be released? I need to plan her funeral," her father said to him.

"Um, probably by tomorrow. I can let you know later on when for sure. Will you be having it in Denver?" He asked. He could hear her father sigh on the other end.

"I'm not sure. She has some friends still there, but she has friends in Vegas now and you."

"Wherever you feel is best, Sir," Greg simply replied. He just wanted to end the call soon before he got sick.

"Yes, well I will have made up my mind by the time you call me back. I have to go now and start making some arrangements. Thank you Greg. I know this cannot be easy for you."

"No, it's not. I'll call back once I know. Again I am sorry Sir," he said somberly.

"It's not your fault, son. Talk to you soon. Goodbye."

Greg darted off to the restroom as soon as he hung up. He ran into a stall and threw up nothing but bile. He leaned over the toilet until there was nothing left in him to throw up. He flushed the toilet and slowly got up and walked over to the sinks. He splashed water in his face after washing his hands.

He finally looked at his sickly looking reflection in the mirror. Her father's words echoed in his head, _it's not your fault._ Still he felt that somehow it was. He promised to protect her. He failed her. He could not look at himself anymore.

He turned his back to the wall and slowly slid down it, clutching his head in his hands. The reality of her being dead finally hit him. He pulled his knees up and hugged them to his chest as he started sobbing. He lost the only woman he was ever going to love and the only woman who would ever love him. He was not sure if he could move on from this, even though he told Catherine otherwise.

Nick got back to the lab with Grissom and headed to use the bathroom. He opened the door and immediately heard the sobbing. He looked over to the side and saw Greg slightly rocking back and forth, all scrunched up on the floor.

He closed the door quietly and knelt down in front of him. "Greg," he said loud enough to get his attention. He picked up his head, looking at him with blood-shot eyes, tears streaming down his face. "She's really gone, isn't she?"

The sound of his voice was heartbreaking. "Yes, Greg, she is," Nick said softly with sympathy.

Greg lowered his head onto his knees again. "Why? Why her? Why didn't I protect her like I promised?"

"You could not be with her 24 hours a day, Greg."

"I told her to be careful. She knew about the case, yet he got to her. Am I cursed? Did I bring this upon her?"

"No you did not. You are not to blame," Nick told him. He saw Greg shake his head. He did not speak however.

"Look, have you talked with Dr. Rayon yet about this?" He asked him.

Greg sniffled. "No, just her father."

"Do you want me to call him for you?" He offered. Greg did not want to deal with his shrink analyzing him right now. "Sure, go ahead."

The door opened and Hodges walked in. Nick immediately glared at him.

The news had already spread through the lab. Hodges always loved to tease the former lab rat, but he knew what happened and he felt sorry for him. "I'll, um, use the other one across the building." He quickly backed out and closed the door again.

Nick turned his attention back to Greg. "Say, why don't we get out of here and move to a more private place." He helped Greg up by giving him his hand. He noticed he was unsteady on his feet. "Let's take you to the break room where you can lay down."

He laid down on the sofa in the break room. "Thanks Nick, you're a good friend," he said to him.

"I am and don't you forget it," Nick smiled, managing to get a little smile from him.

"I won't."

"Get some rest. I'll let the others know to be quiet when they come in here," Nick told him.

"Thanks." Greg closed his eyes once he left him alone in the room. His mind danced with images of her lifeless form in the desert. He doubted he would be able to fall asleep but as long as his migraine went away he could work again. He needed to be the one to find out who this guy was.

****

Nick entered the autopsy room with Grissom. "How's he doing?" Doc Robbins asked as they entered. They knew he was asking about Greg.

"He's got a bad migraine but refuses to go home so he is resting in the break room right now," Nick told him.

"I'm glad he did not come here. It is hard enough seeing her dead, but then seeing her like this," he gestured to her cut open corpse.

"Yeah," Nick said as he looked down at her. He met her a couple of times. He felt her loss a bit too, but mostly felt sympathy for Greg.

"So tell us what we have, Al," Grissom said, breaking a brief moment of silence.

"Pretty much the same as the last two victims. Lacerations on her back suggest the whipping before death. Found this again in her vaginal tract." He held up a small specimen jar with a silver substance in it.

Nick took it from him and looked at it. "Silver liquid latex again. Guy has some kind of fetish with it. Do you think he uses it as some sort of condom?"

"Who knows? Unfortunately that lead is too vague. Is there anything new that might give us a lead on him?" Grissom asked.

"I'm sorry but nothing stands out that you already don't have. I can say and you can tell Greg this, that she has a lot of defensive wounds so she fought back when she could."

"Not much consolation but it is something to give him," Grissom said somberly.

A couple hours later, Greg was standing in the layout room with Nick and Grissom, looking over their newest evidence. Nick had run a match on the shoe treads that had been found at all three crime scenes. They narrowed down the shoe tread to a pair of hiking boots.

"He grabs them here," Nick circled on a map.

"And then he drops them off way out here." He placed another circle on the map.

"That's about 15 miles between the two points. Perhaps he works near one location and lives near the other," Greg suggested.

"Well we believe he grabs them during the daytime hours, so perhaps near a work location. He dumps them in the middle of the desert, possibly close to where he takes them and kills them," Grissom said as he looked over the map.

"He likes to dump them off in the same area. Is there any sort of landmark or sign out there that he is able to remember the location?" Nick wondered aloud.

Greg thought for a moment. "It is a somewhat popular area for hikers and our guy wears hiking boots, so maybe we are looking at a hiker. Maybe we should go out there and talk to some of the regulars out there and see if they have seen anything out of the ordinary lately."

"It's worth a try. I'll have Brass get some uniforms on that. In the meantime, Greg, we need to go to Marie's apartment and take a look for any clues that may have been left. Do you think you can handle going there now?" Grissom asked him, not wanting his young CSI to deal with her place if he was not ready for it.

Greg took a deep breath and exhaled slowly before responding. "Yeah I can do it. Besides, I would be able to tell if something was out of place, since I have spent so much time there."

"That's why I felt it best if you go with Nick." Greg just nodded sullenly. "We'll catch him and he will be put behind bars for the rest of his life," Grissom said to the younger man. Greg's eyes looked away from him as he stared at the map.

The drive over to her apartment was quiet. Nick decided not to disturb his devastated friend if he did not want to talk.

As they approached the door, Greg took out his key to her place. He paused a moment before unlocking and opening the door. He shivered as a cold breeze kicked up behind them before they walked in.

His eyes looked around for any sign of something being out of place, while Nick checked the door for fingerprints or any sign of tampering around her windows.

Greg entered her bedroom and saw her bed neatly made. He thought of the many nights they spent together, curled up in that bed. The pain of her loss struck him again. He felt dizzy a moment and grasped the dresser to steady him. He took a couple of breaths. He had to get through this for her.

After a thorough search of the room, he came up with nothing but his own memories of the good times they spent in there. He fought to hold back a fury that was starting to build inside him. It was something he felt once before not too long ago and he did not want to feel that way again. Luckily for him Nick walked in to speak to him.

"I have collected prints but they all seem to match hers or yours. Sorry," he said with a downtrodden look.

Greg shook his head. "There has to be something to find about this guy."

"Are there security cameras in the lot? Maybe we can see when she was last here and if she was grabbed here," Nick suggested.

"Hmm, I think there are. I did not even think of that," Greg scolded himself.

"Don't beat yourself up about it. You've had a lot to deal with in the last 12 hours. We'll see if we can get the video footage for the last two days and then head back to the lab. Then I think it is time to get some rest; refresh so we can have clearer heads next shift," Nick said to him with soft eyes.

"I guess. I know I need to get out of here. It's bad enough I'll have to come back here in a day or two and figure out what to do with her stuff," he sighed.

"What about her father?"

"I'm not sure. I need to see when her body will be released so he can make funeral plans." Nick could see his emotional struggle in his eyes.

"You'll get through this. We are here to help you, do not be ashamed to lean on us," Nick told him sincerely.

"Thanks. Let's get out of here."


	6. Chapter 6

_A/N- Sorry a week late but have not had a lot of typing time lately. Again thanks for the reviews. I'm glad most of you were basically okay with me killing Marie off. As the story progresses I think you will see how Greg deals with it. And no there isn't going to be any more possible relationships, other than friendship in this one. This is a non-slash story. I am working on a new slash one presently though for you Nick/Greg fans. That won't be posted for at least a month or more though. _

_Thanks for reading!  
_

* * *

Greg knew he should go straight home but he could not bear to be there alone. He drove not exactly knowing where he was headed. He passed a few bars along the way, tempted to always stop in one but he did not. Once he got out of the city he knew where he was headed

The side of the road still had police tape around the main part of the scene where her body was found. He pulled over on the side of the road and got out of the vehicle. If he was not going to sleep, he was at least going to try his best to find out who killed her.

Instead of walking to the taped off area, he walked further into the desert area. He walked up the ridge and found a hiking path. He followed the path further up until he came to the top of the ridge. He scanned the surrounding area. From this higher viewpoint, he could see two of the crime scenes; Marie's being the main one of his focus. He looked around more and saw a few hikers on the other side of the ridge camping out. As he looked more he saw a small cluster of homes only a mile or so away. He wondered if their killer lived in one of those homes. It was a far off chance but he would pursue all measures.

He went back down to the taped off area. He stared at the ground where Marie's body had laid. That final image of her stayed in his mind, haunting him. He was not sure how long he stood there just staring at the sandy ground. The longer he stood there, the angrier he got. He had to be the one to find this guy.

He was startled when his cell phone rang. He did not recognize the phone number. "Hello?" He answered.

"Greg? This is Major Somers. I haven't heard from you and I found your phone number from when Marie had given me some contact numbers. Do you know when her body will be released?"

Greg closed his eyes. He forgot to call her father. He had meant to but his mind was so full of stuff. "I'm sorry. I've been so busy working the case. Her body will be released tomorrow."

"It's okay, Greg. Any leads on her killer yet?"

"Not yet, but we are trying to narrow our search areas," he told him.

"I've decided to have her funeral there in Vegas and have a small memorial in Colorado. She will be buried next to her mother. If you can tell me of a good funeral parlor in Vegas, I will do the rest. I am getting a three-week leave starting Wednesday. I'll head to Vegas then," her father told him.

Greg sort of wished she would be buried there in Vegas but he knew that was doubtful. "I appreciate you having the service here. Her other friends and co-workers will be happy. I can understand you burying her next to her mother. She would have wanted that."

"I know she would have. I just never though it would have been so soon after her mother. She should have had many more years ahead of her."

Greg could hear the Major starting to choke up. "I know. I am sorry."

"No, no you made her happy. I know you did your best to protect her. Just find the creep who took my daughter from me."

"I plan to."

Greg had finished the conversation with her father and decided to leave the desert scene. As he was driving back he passed a pawnshop. An idea struck him. He did a U-turn and drove back to the pawnshop.

He stepped inside the small shop. It had rust colored, worn carpeting and smelled of cigarette smoke. No other customers were in there. He walked up to the counter and looked at the items under the glass case. Jewelry, guns, knives, cell phones, laptops and all sorts of various collectible type items were for sale.

"Can I help you?" Greg looked up and saw an old, scruffy looking man come out from the back office.

"Hi, are you the owner here?"

The guy looked at him suspiciously, having been robbed before. "Yes, why?"  
"Oh, my name is Greg Sanders. I work for the Las Vegas Crime Lab." He pulled out his ID and the owner relaxed some.

"What can I do for you?"

"Have you had a guy come in here recently with several items, say jewelry and cell phones perhaps?" He asked him.

"I have lots of people come in here with those items," he replied slowly.

Greg clicked his tongue, trying not to get annoyed. "I understand that, Sir, but I am looking for some guy in particular. He most likely would bring in woman's jewelry and possibly used cell phones."

While the older man thought for a moment, Greg had an idea. He pulled out his wallet and took out a photo he had taken of Marie about a month ago. She always wore a small cross necklace around her neck. "Have you seen a necklace like this?" He showed the owner the photo.

"No, I can't say that I have," the man said after studying the photo.

"If you see someone turn it in, can you give me a call?" Greg took out a card and wrote his number on it.

"Was this a stolen item?" The Pawn Shop owner asked.

"Yeah, you could say that." Greg said as he looked down at the guns in the display case, suddenly getting a feeling. "How much for that .357 Magnum revolver there?" He pointed out the one he was referring to.

The owner looked at him a moment in wonder and then looked back down at the gun. "It's $300 for you."

Greg chewed on his bottom lip a moment, pondering whether to buy the gun or not. It would be easier than getting caught stealing one from ballistics again. He could get a permit easy enough with what he did for a living. He would have it on him for when he needed it. He had thoughts about buying a gun for a while now. After this incident he knew it was time.

"Can I take a look at it?" He asked.

"Sure." The owner unlocked the cabinet and pulled out the gun and handed it to Greg.

Greg held it in his hands, seeing if it was a comfortable grip. Then he opened the barrel to check it for defects.

"I suppose in your job you know your guns," the owner commented.

"Yeah," Greg said quietly as it was true. Although he still remembered when he held the gun to his head in order to take his own life. He set it back on the counter. "I'll take it."

The Pawn Shop owner did not bother telling him about the permit needed, figuring he had one. Greg took out his credit card to pay for it.

"Don't forget to call me if someone comes in with this necklace. Remember what he looks like and get as much information from him as you can," Greg told him.

Greg had never been a fan of guns but recently with everything that had been going on he felt it was more of a necessity to have one. He sat in his car and stared at the gun. He would have to buy bullets for it. Those he could get at a lot of places. That would be his next stop.

_The desert was cold. He was not sure how he got there. He looked to his left and saw nothing but the desert surrounded in darkness. He looked to his right and that is when he saw her. She lay on the ground in a white gown. He walked over to her and as he got closer he saw a pool of blood on her gown, right in the middle of her chest. He looked down at her pale, beautiful face._

_"I miss you," he said to her. Suddenly her eyes opened up and she began to stand up. He stepped back a few steps in shock._

_She walked towards him, a twisted, pained looked on her face. "You did not protect me like you promised me. You promised me!" she yelled at him._

_He was startled and scared by her at the same time. "I'm sorry. I thought I warned you. I thought that was enough."_

_"Enough? You lied to me. You were not supposed to let this happen to me. You need to suffer like I suffered!" She ran at him, arms stretched out, screaming._

His eyes flew open as he sat up quickly in his bed. His heart was pounding in his chest. A nightmare, he knew he was going to have one but he did not think it would be like that.

He sat on the edge of the bed and rubbed his face. He wondered if she really did blame him for not being there for her. He got up and walked into the bathroom. He opened his medicine cabinet to get some pain medication for his brewing headache when he saw her toothbrush and hairbrush on the bottom shelf.

He pulled out the hairbrush along with his pills. He sat back on the edge of his tub and turned the brush over in his hand, looking at the hairs in it that belonged to Marie. Was this all he would have left of her, small simple items like a toothbrush and her hairbrush? "It's not right. You shouldn't be dead." He said aloud. Anger and regret built up inside him. He threw the brush at the mirror showing his reflection. The mirror shattered into pieces.

He looked at the busted mirror and broke out laughing, but it was a sad laugh. His phone rang all of the sudden. He got up and chuckled some more when he saw who it was. He answered the phone.

"Greg?" The voice on the other line said.

"You have some impeccable timing, Doc. Do you have a hidden camera in my place?" He asked.

"What's going on, Greg? I heard about Marie. How are you holding up?" Dr. Rayon, his psychiatrist asked.

Greg went and sat down on his bed, bringing his legs up and sitting crossed legged. He sighed. "I am going to have seven more years bad luck now, go figure. This year has not been enough."

"What happened?" The doctor's voice was concerned.

"I busted my mirror with the hairbrush Marie always left here," he confessed.

"I was told by your boss that you insisted on still working her case. Are you sure that is such a good idea?"

Greg rolled his eyes, even though he knew his doctor could not see it. "Yes, I am sure I can work this case still. I'm going to find who did this to her and make him pay."

Dr. Rayon was not sure it was such a good idea. "I want to see you before your next visit. I think we need to talk."

Greg was getting annoyed now. He hardly even mentioned Marie. "Do you even care that she is dead? She was one of your patients and you worked with her!" He said with a raised voice.

"I am mourning her loss but that does not mean I cannot still help you. Greg, only a little over four months ago you tried to kill yourself. Now you have lost a woman you loved to a violent crime. I want to know where your mind is at."

Greg got up and started pacing. "I'm fine, Doc, really. I mean, I'm angry and upset of course, but I will not be able to mourn properly until this guy is found. He could kill others still as long as he is out there. More innocent, beautiful lives." He heard his doctor sigh on the other end.

"Okay but I want to see you still. Can you come tomorrow afternoon after your shift?"

"I'll try, but if there is a big break on the case, I'm working," he told him.

"Fine. Just call me if you need me. I'm here for you."

"Okay I will. Bye Doc." Greg hung up and cursed. He was so sick of everyone worrying about him. They needed to be worried about this crazy killer on the loose, not about him. He was the only one who was truly focused on finding this guy.

He went to his dresser drawer and pulled out his gun. He opened a box of ammo and started loading the gun. "I should have given you a gun, perhaps you would still be alive," he said as he looked at a photo of him and Marie together.

"I'll find out who he is, who took you away from me. I'll make sure he is put away for life."

***

Nick came into the locker room and saw Greg sitting on the bench, looking exhausted. "Hey!"

He looked up at him with bloodshot eyes. "Hey," he responded quietly.

"Did you get any sleep?" he asked him.

Greg shrugged. "Just a little. Too much stuff on my mind to really sleep," he said sheepishly.

"Have you talked with Dr. Rayon?" Nick asked out of concern.

Greg snickered in response. Nick furrowed his eyebrows. "What's wrong?"

Greg stood up and got in his face. "Does anyone care about finding this killer? All anyone cares about is me! I seem to be the only one concerned with finding this guy."

Nick was stunned by his outburst. "We are working to find this guy, but we are also concerned about you. You've been through a lot lately. And after you tried to kill yourself last time, I think we have every right to worry."

Greg lowered his head and sat back down on the bench, putting his head in his hands. "I'm sorry to jump on you like that. Lack of sleep and all this is making me a bit crazy." He picked up his head and looked up at Nick. "I did talk with my shrink. He wants me to see him after work tonight."

"Well I am glad to hear you talked to him. Now let's get some coffee in you and get to work," he said with a soft smile.

He nodded. "Yeah, coffee is a must," he smiled a bit as he stood up and followed Nick out.

As they went about talking about evidence, Greg never mentioned his trip out to the scene and his visit to the Pawn Shop. Unless something came from it, there was no need to mention it.

Nick and Greg were going over the victim profiles again when Henry came in. He looked a bit nervous. "Hey guys, I, uh, got results on Marie's toxicology. She was drugged by a different substance." He looked at Greg now specifically. "She had small traces of Scopolamine in her system." Greg's eyes opened wide.

"What? Let me see!" Henry handed him the results. Nick looked over Greg's shoulder.

"Not a heavy dosage like was in your system, though. My guess is he heard how it could knock a person out if used in a high enough dosage. Maybe he ran out of the other stuff or lost his access to it," Nick said as he looked at it.

Greg was quiet. His mind was whirling all of the sudden. Did this person purposely pick Marie because of her association with him? Did this person know Robin Weaver? His head started to ache with all the new possibilities.

Nick noticed he looked at a bit lost. "Hey G, are you doing okay? What are you thinking?"

He looked at him. "What if Marie was targeted because of me?"

"I doubt it, Greg." Nick told him.

"What if this guy knows Robin Weaver? What if she told him to pick her?" He said rapidly.

Nick could tell he was getting upset. He nodded at Henry to let him know he could go now. Once he was gone he focused on Greg. "Okay, I doubt that too. If anything the guy saw the news and heard about the drug usage and decided to try it out."

"I guess. I know I'm sounding paranoid but things have been too coincidental in my life recently. In any case, we need to look deeper at guys who have access to these medications," Greg said to him, refocusing on finding this guy.

"I agree. Let's pay a visit to Desert Palms and work our way down the medical centers," Nick told him.

They spent a good portion of their shift finding out about personnel who had access to the two drugs. The list was rather large. When they got back to the lab, they split up the list and started running names and profiles through their database.

After working a few hours overtime, no one came up really suspicious. "Greg, let's quit for now before my eyes fall out," Nick said to him as he stretched back in his chair.

Greg rubbed his eyes and yawned. He was exhausted and he still had to see his shrink after work. "Yeah, I agree. We'll pick up on this again this evening."

"You get some sleep. Take some pills if you have to, you look like crap," Nick told him with a smirk.

"You don't look much better. I'll see you later on. I better go see Dr. Rayon before he calls the cops out after me," he grumbled.

"Good luck with that. See you later."


	7. Chapter 7

Greg dragged himself into Dr. Rayon's office building. His receptionist saw him and offered a sad smile. "I'm sorry to hear about Marie, Greg," she said to him.

"Thanks. Is he ready?" Greg nodded towards the door.

"Yes, he is expecting you. Go on in."

Greg went through the door and saw Dr. Rayon getting up to greet him. "Hello Greg. How are you feeling today?"

Greg slumped down in a chair after shaking his hand. "I am exhausted and mad that we are no closer to catching this guy."

Dr. Rayon smiled a bit. "I can understand that. Hopefully you will find him soon. Now how are you really dealing with her death?"

Greg rubbed his hands over his face. "I'm so so. I just can't believe I will never see her again. We were going to find a place together and move in. Now this whole bright future I had with her is gone, destroyed by some maniac."

"Do you feel like you have no future now? Do you think you will ever find someone again who will accept you?"

"I'm not even thinking that far ahead. I just lost her. I'm not ready to think about anyone else, you already have me moving on," he raised his voice at him.

Dr. Rayon was taken back by his angry response. "Okay, maybe I am jumping too far ahead but there is no need to get mad about it."

Greg glared at him. "You would be mad too if the woman you loved just became another victim of a case you were working on."

"So how does it make you feel that you were a victim of a case you were working on and now Marie is one of your cases' victims? Do you think it might be you? Do you think you are truly cursed?" He carefully watched for Greg's reaction to these ideas. He noticed he seemed to be quietly contemplating the questions.

Greg stared down at the ground. He spoke softly. "I had a nightmare last night. She blames me for what happened to her; that I did not protect her. Maybe she is right, maybe everything happens because I am cursed and anyone who is near me now could be next."

Dr. Rayon could hear the sadness in his voice. He could see his emotions were all over the place too. "You are not cursed. You are having some incredibly bad stuff happening to you but you did the best you could to protect her. You could not have known she would be chosen."

"Yeah but the thing is I did warn her because the other two women lived close to where she lived," he told him.

"So you did warn her, perhaps she was not careful enough. It was her fault she was grabbed, not yours."

Greg got a bit mad about that. "She is careful. She always was. She could not help it there was some crazy man out there. We should have caught him before he got to her!"

The doctor could see he was going to find a way to blame himself no matter what he said. He decided to change the subject a bit. "I've noticed you have not refilled your Prozac prescription. Why not?"

Greg was feeling blindsided by the question. "I, uh, thought you said I could try going without it for a try. Things were going well in my life so I stopped."

"When did you last take one?"

"Umm, two weeks ago."

"I want you to refill your prescription and start taking them again. You are dealing with a lot right now and it will help stabilize your emotions."

Greg hated taking them. He did not know why other than it made him feel inferior to have to take them. "You think I'm going to try to take my life again, is that it?" he huffed.

"No, but given your circumstances and just seeing you today I can tell you need them," he told him bluntly.

"Fine," Greg replied bitterly.

Dr. Rayon raised an eyebrow, slightly amused and worried at the same time. "Have you spoken with your parents recently? Do they know about Marie?'

Greg looked out the window before he responded. "No, I have not. There is no need to bother them right now with this."

Dr. Rayon sighed. "Didn't you promise them to keep them filled in on everything major that happened in your life from now on? I would call this major. You do not want to disappoint them, do you?"

Greg glared at him. "You know sometimes I really hate you." This comment made his doctor laugh.

"Really Greg, I am just trying to help you," he said after he saw the irritation on his face.

Greg stood up and walked to the window. "I know. I'm just angry and frustrated and upset. I really want to find this guy."

"I know. Is there anything else I should know about?"

"Well this might make me sound crazier but I think there might be a link to Robin Weaver."

"Really? How so?" Dr. Rayon asked, his curiosity peeked.

"Scopolamine was used on Marie," he told him.

"You think that this person knows her? It could be he saw all the news on Robin's case and saw that drug as something different to try."

Greg shook his head. "It's too much of a coincidence. I mean to use that drug on my girlfriend? None of the previous victims had it in their systems."

"I don't know Greg. To me it sounds like another reason for you to try to blame yourself."

"Perhaps but I don't think so."

Dr. Rayon frowned. "Well when you catch him, hopefully you will be able to find out. Anything else?"

Greg shook his head. "No, I just need to try to get some sleep."

"Do you want a prescription for sleeping pills?"

"I still have some left from last time. Thanks anyways."

"Okay, well I will let you go. If you need anything do not hesitate to call me. And I would suggest you call your parents. Goodbye, Greg."

He rolled his eyes before getting up to shake his hand and leave. "Bye Doc."

He drove straight home. When he walked inside his place, he had a couple messages on his machine. The first one had been a reminder from Dr. Rayon to come in for his appointment. The second happened to be from his mother.

"Hello Son. We have not heard from you in awhile. Please give your dear parents a call to let us know you are okay. We love you. Bye."

Greg sighed and decided to take his shower first before calling them.

He picked up the phone and stretched out on top of his bed, his hair still damp from his shower. He used the speed dial to call his parents. He recognized his mother's voice as she answered the phone.

"Hi Mom. How are you?" He asked, not wanting to bring up Marie's murder right away.

"Greg, it is about time you called. We are doing well. How are you? How is that lovely Marie doing?"

He cringed, nothing like his mom getting to the point he wanted to avoid. "Uh, well, uh" this was harder than he thought it would be. He cleared his throat.

"Did you two break up?" She asked suddenly.

He wished it were only that simple. "Uh, she was…uh," he sighed heavily. "She is dead. She was killed the other night." He knew his voice was unsteady and tears began to threaten as exhaustion swept over him.

"Oh my God! When did this happen? Are you working the case? How are you holding up?" She asked rapidly in worry.

Greg took a shaky breath. "Two nights ago and I was called to the scene. I identified her. We have another serial killer on the loose, victimizing women," he told her.

"Oh dear. That city…I know it's your job but lately it is taking over your life. You are becoming a victim of the crimes you are supposed to be solving. Are you going to be okay? Do you want us to come out? What about her funeral?"

"Her father decided to have her funeral here. She will be buried in Colorado though, next to her mother. You don't have to come out here. I have Dr. Rayon and everyone at work looking out for me, Mom."

"Well, I am glad they are looking out for you but we are your parents. We have every right to worry about you, especially after your suicide attempt," she said quietly.

He fought back tears. He was so tired and wished he was not living this horrible nightmare. He wanted so badly to be able to hold Marie right that moment. She could make him feel better. She was the only one who really did since his abduction and torture.

"Mom, I'll be okay. I'm still working the case. I'm going to find this guy and he will pay," he finally told her.

"You do not sound okay," she said. She could hear it in his voice.

"Well, I did just lose the woman I love to a murderer. I think I have every right to not be okay," he yelled into the phone, getting frustrated. He noticed his mother did not say anything. That made him feel guilty. He rubbed his hand over his face. "I'm sorry, Mom. I'm just so tired. I didn't mean to yell at you," he apologized. He heard her sigh.

"It's okay. You should know by now I just worry about you."

He smiled to himself. "I should know by now, shouldn't I? If you guys want to visit, just give me forewarning please," he told her.  
"I promise we will. I'll let you go get some sleep but call us at anytime if you need us. We love you, don't ever forget that," she told him.

"I love you too. Say hello to Dad for me," he said to her.

"Will do. Goodbye, sweetie. Take care."

After he finished his conversation with her and put his phone away, he thought he better try to get some sleep. He was worried about having nightmares again though. He would have to suffer through them if he was going to make it through the next shift.

****

He managed to sleep a few hours but still woke up feeling exhausted. He went into the bathroom and forgot his mirror was broken. He would have to replace that. Perhaps it was better he could not see how bad he looked right now.

He opened up the medicine cabinet to grab his toothbrush and saw hers there still. He stared at it, remembering a time he walked into the bathroom after she had just stepped out of the shower. She was reaching to grab her toothbrush and her towel that was wrapped around her slipped off. He had wolf-whistled at her. Instead of picking the towel back up, she had told him if he got to ogle her, she deserved to ogle over him naked. He was amused enough to start stripping off his own clothes. Once he was naked she came over to him and started making out with him. He remembered ending up on the tile floor with his arms wrapped around her.

A tear escaped from his eyes as he shook his head to try to forget that those moments were gone forever now. "I'm going to find the bastard who did this to you, Marie. That I do promise you."

Nick watched Greg warily as he went through the autopsy photos of Marie. He had insisted on seeing them, in case they were missing something. Nick had advised against it, remembering the horrible reaction he had to his own photos of his bodily torture.

"Greg, you don't have to do this. You are not going to find anything new evidence wise in those photos. All you are going to find is pain by seeing her like that," Nick told him, hoping he would stop.

Greg glared at him. "I already see her like this in my dreams. This won't change that." He looked back down at a photo of the welts on her back. He hated that she went through some of the same pain and torture type he had suffered. Another photo revealed cigarette burns on her. His felt cold as he thought about what she went through. He finally closed the folder, realizing it was too hard for him to see the photos after all.

"Come on Greg, its dinner break. Let me get you some food and some fresh coffee," Nick offered. He knew he probably was not eating properly, if at all.

He sighed and looked sheepishly at him. "Okay, sounds good."

Nick glanced across the table at Greg, who had been playing with his food but not eating hardly any of it. He seemed distant. He had been quiet.

"Greg, are you going to eat anything? You can't starve yourself. What would Marie think?"

"Don't mention her name to me right now in what she would think of me. I feel guilty about as it is," he grumbled, still staring at his plate.

"Sorry man. I'll try to stop nagging you."

Greg looked up at him. "That I would appreciate," he said with the tiniest of grins.

"I think after we find this guy, you should take a break from work and maybe Vegas."

Greg was surprised. "You sound like Grissom now."

"I'm being serious, Greg," Nick told him.

He pushed his plate away. "I don't know what I am going to do after all of this. I just know my focus for now."

"Well, let's get back to work then and find this guy." Nick paid for their bill before they got up to go back to work.

Back at the lab, Captain Brass came up to them. "Hey, we have a report of a missing woman. She was last seen last night at work. She had a very important meeting today and did not show up. They heard about our killer and said she fits our guy's profile for victims."

"Really? She lived near where the others lived?" Greg asked feeling like a lead was finally coming to them.

"Yes, same apartment complex as our first victim. You guys want to go to her place and search it, you can. Her parents already said we could. Maybe we can find him before he kills her," Brass told them.

Nick and Greg got their kits and headed over to Kate Hall's apartment. They searched it but turned up no clues to her disappearance. The surveillance videos showed no suspicious activity either, just as the video of Marie's apartment parking lot had come up with nothing. So wherever he was grabbing them he made sure he was out of the camera's views.

"Is this guy invisible? How does he manage to get these girls without being seen on camera?" Nick asked as they sat back in the lab with Archie and Greg watching the video.

"Maybe he walks on property. Maybe he parks his car nearby, but out of sight of security. Then he walks onto property," Archie suggested.

Greg shook his head. "No, we would see him carry their bodies out." He watched the video play before him and suddenly something clicked. "Wait, look. That van with the printing on the side. I remember seeing that in the surveillance from Marie's complex. Can you zero in on that?"  
Archie zoomed in and focused on the person. "Hat is covering his face, but we can make out what it says on his van. 'Right Clean Carpets.'"

"Can you get the other videos and see if it is the same van?" Nick asked.

"There is no phone number, weird don't you think? Businesses always put their phone numbers on a company vehicle to advertise," Greg said as he looked at the still image of the van. He felt excited at the possible new lead.

Archie got the other videos and worked through them. "There it is again. Same sign on the side," he pointed out the blue Ford Van.

"The sign looks like one of those magnetic ones. Easy to put on and take off," Nick commented.

"Yeah and in an apartment complex they are not going to question a carpet cleaner coming in. A perfect cover," Greg said, feeling the pieces coming together more.

"Let's find out if this carpet cleaner is for real or not. I'll check the phone book," Nick said.

"And I'll surf the net and see if there is any match to our carpet cleaning company. Archie, go through the videos again and see if you can see the van again and see a license plate number," Greg said to him.

An hour later Nick and Greg came together in the layout room. Grissom came in a few moments behind them. "I hear you guys have a new lead?" he asked them.

"We do but it's still coming up empty. Our carpet cleaning company does not exist here in Nevada. I found a couple in other states and contacted them. They have no one out here in Vegas," Greg sighed.

"But at least we do have time frames now when he abducted out vics from the video footage of when the van entered the properties and left," Nick said.

"So when does he seem to abduct these women?" Grissom asked.

"He comes close to noon hour and leaves only about 45 minutes later," Nick said.

"He must have something that he carries out their unconscious bodies without looking suspicious," Grissom said as he thought it over.

"We should go back and ask the victims neighbors and see if they remember this carpet cleaner guy and maybe what he looks like," Nick suggested.

"Good idea. I'll call Brass and have him get some Unies to do that." Grissom noticed Greg was quiet and seemed in deep thought. "What's on your mind, Greg?"

He looked up and blinked his eyes. "Huh?"

"What were you thinking about?"

Greg noticed Nick's eyes were fixed on him now too. He didn't really want to tell them how he was picturing Marie opening her door to this creep and the guy putting a needle in her neck to subdue her. He did not want them to know how all his thoughts were always consumed with her dead body or his hate for her killer; how he would not stop until he was caught. This was not a case he would let go of.

"I was, uh, thinking how this guy might be carrying them out. Maybe a rolled up piece of carpet? Might be slightly strange to see a carpet cleaner to carry one out but not out of the ordinary. Like an area rug, he could roll up their bodies in and carry them out," he said, thinking off the top of his head.

"Quite possible. If that is the case, our guy is probably pretty strong," Grissom responded.

"I'll have Brass tell the Unies to ask about that too."

It was near the end of their shift when Brass found Nick and Greg going over paperwork in the break room. "Hey fellas, we have a possible witness to our carpet cleaner/suspect. He will be coming in to go to a sketch artist later today."

"Why not right away?" Greg asked, getting impatient with the slow pace of the case.

"He is a lawyer and had to be in court first thing this morning. He said he would come as soon as court was over," Brass told them. Grissom came in. He had overheard Jim's conversation.

"Why don't you guys go home and get some sleep for now? Not much we can do until we get new info." Grissom said to them.

Greg knew he was right and he was feeling exhausted. Hopefully he would be able to get some sleep so he would be fresh to work on the case for their next shift.


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N-Well here is the next chapter. This one is a major one...lots of stuff happens in it. Might shock you all. Might not. LOL Please review and let me know what you think.  
**

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* * *

**When he got home he fell on top of his bed and closed his eyes, not even bothering to change his clothes or anything. He had felt a migraine coming on and just wanted to be still.

_He opened his eyes and saw her lying next to him. He jumped up off the bed and stared at her, horrified. "Why didn't you protect me?" Her green eyes seemed to glow against her deathly white face. Dried blood covered her white night gown. _

_"I warned you. I tried my best. I'm sorry," he told her with tears in his eyes._

_She sat up on the bed and reached her hands out to his. He hid his hands in his pockets, scared to have her touch him._

_"You're apologies are too late. I loved you and you let me suffer and die. You might as well have killed me yourself," she suddenly yelled at him._

_He started backing away. "No, I could never kill you. You make me happy. I loved you."_

_She stood up and started coming towards him. As she came closer, the bruises on her face became more pronounced and blood began to flow out of her chest wound. She backed him into a corner. "You did not love me otherwise I would not be dead now. You did this to me," she sneered._

_Tears fell from his eyes. "No, I loved you. I would never hurt you."_

_"You're a monster after all." The voice was hers but the face transformed into the only monster he really knew. Robin Weaver was suddenly the one standing before him, with a mocking smile. _

_Greg shook his head. "No, I am not. I did nothing wrong." But he was scared to death inside. "Oh but My Pet, you did." She reached out to touch him. He screamed._

His eyes flew open as he sat up quickly in bed. His heart was hammering in his chest along with his head now too. _'That was a hell of a nightmare,'_ he thought to himself. Marie morphing into Robin Weaver really freaked him out. He did not kill Marie, _why did she think he was a monster?_

His cell phone suddenly rang. It startled him out of his thoughts. He picked it up and answered it. "Hello?"

"Um, is this Greg Sanders?" an unfamiliar voice asked.

"Yes it is. Who is this?"

"This is Richard from the Gold Mine Pawn Shop. You gave me your phone number the other day if I should see anything suspicious turned in like you showed me."

"Ah yes. So someone came in with those items?" He asked, feeling some excitement suddenly.

"Yes, a man came in only 15 minutes ago," he told him.

Greg got excited. "Did you get any information from him?"

"Yes, I got some. Not sure it is real, as he seemed reluctant to give it to me but I have it."

"Great! I'll be there as soon as I can." Greg felt like he finally was going to get this guy. He looked at the time and saw it was still a couple hours before work. He slept longer than he thought he had.

He took a quick shower and put on clean clothes and was on his way in all of 20 minutes. His stomach growled on his drive to the pawnshop but he easily ignored it. He was too hyped up on finally getting some leads on this killer.

He parked his car in front of the Gold Mine Pawn Shop and went inside. The older man, Richard, who owned the shop, was cleaning the glass on the cabinet when he walked in. He looked up when he saw the younger man come in. "Ah Officer Sanders, I have your information over here."

Greg did not bother correcting him on the title as he followed the man into his back office.

"When he came in I did not think anything of him until I saw this." He held up a necklace that Greg recognized immediately. He took it from Richard and handled it very delicately. He swallowed the lump in his throat as he held the precious memory of Marie in his palm.

"That's the necklace the woman was wearing in that photo you showed me," Richard pointed out to him.

"Yes it is." Greg broke out of his trance and memories and refocused on finding this guy. "What else did he bring in?"

Richard showed him a couple of pairs of gold earrings, a couple of cell phones, and some watches. Greg recognized a few more of the items as Marie's. His blood began to boil.

"What information did you get from him?" Greg finally asked.

"I had him fill out our receipt form." The owner slid the paper over to him. Greg slipped on some gloves he had in his pocket before taking the form. Hopefully there might be some nice fingerprints on the piece of paper. He looked at the name, address, and phone number on the paper.

"Cory Jones, definitely a fake last name," he thought. _1232 Eula Road_, he took out his phone and pulled up the address to map it out. It was only a couple of miles away. He then dialed the phone number. It was a non-working number. No surprise there either. He looked back at Richard. "Anything else?"

"Well, I got him on my surveillance video but he was wearing a baseball cap, so it is hard to make out his face. I did see him drive away in a blue Ford Van."

Greg's eyes went wide. "Did it say Right Clean Carpet Cleaners on it?"

"No, nothing on it from what I could tell. Guy seemed nervous. Oh and he was wearing black leather gloves. It's cold but not that cold out, I thought."

"Yeah." Greg knew the guy did not want to leave prints then and the paper most likely had none. Richard showed him the surveillance video. The guy kept his head low the whole time but Greg could see he had dark hair under the Arizona Cardinals baseball cap. He looked about 6'2" and 200 pounds by what he could tell. He wore black pants and a blue hoodie, zipped up high. Greg thought he had a rough enough idea that if he saw this guy in person he would know it was him.

"Do me a favor." Greg started writing down information on a blank sheet of paper. "Call this number. It's to my co-worker Nick Stokes. Tell him that I told you to come on down here and collect the video footage and the rest of the items he turned in. I'm taking this," he said as he pocketed Marie's necklace. "Tell him I am working on the lead in our serial killer case."

"Uh, okay," Richard said to him, slightly perplexed.

"Thanks. You have been a huge help." Greg took the direction on his cell phone and Marie's necklace and headed back out to his car.

Once inside his car, he opened his glove compartment and pulled out the gun he purchased from the pawn show a couple days prior. His permit that he just received in the mail sat under it. He opened the barrel to make sure it was loaded and put it down on the seat next to him.

He started his car and looked into the moonlit night. "Cory Jones or whatever your name is, no more getting away with murder. I'm getting justice for Marie."

Nick was heading into the lab early when his phone rang. "Stokes here."

"Um, Nick Stokes, this is Richard Pontibrand at Gold Mine Pawn Shop out on Highway 160. Your partner, Officer Sanders told me to call you and advise you he is working a lead on your serial killer case. He asked for you to come out here and pick up video surveillance and items the man brought in, I guess of the victims."

Nick was confused. "Wait a minute! You had someone there drop off items from our case? What exactly did Greg do? Where is he now?"

"He took a necklace with a cross that he showed a pretty brunette girl wearing. I guess she was killed? He had the address of this guy. He took off with it."

Nick's mind was racing. What was Greg thinking? "What is your address and the address of this guy?"

After getting the information from the pawnshop owner and telling him someone would be out to collect the evidence, Nick made a call to Greg.

Greg was in his car, still a little bit away from his destination. He figured Nick would call him once he heard from the pawnshop owner.

"Sanders," he answered.

"What the hell do you think you are doing? You've been investigating this case outside of work? Have you told anyone?" Nick yelled over the phone at him.

"I told you I was going to do whatever I could to find this guy," Greg said calmly.

"Does that have to mean working behind our backs? I would have been with you every step of the way if you told me."

"It's not like that, Nick. The other day I could not stand to go home right away so I drove out to where we found her body. On the way back I passed this pawnshop and I had an idea. I asked the guy if anyone had turned in women's jewelry and cell phones and similar lately. He said no. Then I showed him a photo I had of Marie wearing her cross necklace and told him to call me if he had anyone come in with it. He called me today and sure enough. This has to be our guy!"

"So you are going after him alone? Are you nuts?" Nick asked, astonished.

"I broke my promise to her in protecting her. I'm at least going to be the one to catch this guy!" Greg said determined.

"That's not our job, Greg. We find the evidence and then the real cops bring him in. What are you going to do if you find him? You're not armed," Nick argued.

"I am now. Got my firearms permit today. Bought the gun a few days ago," he told him.

"Greg, this is crazy. You know that. You are in over your head. I am heading out there. Do not do anything until I'm there," Nick told him.

"You're not stopping me from catching him, Nick. I'm almost there anyway. Bye Nick!" And he hung up the phone.

Nick was pissed off and more than that extremely worried. He made a U-turn and headed in the direction of the address he was given. He tried calling Greg again but he would not pick up. "Damn you, Greg! You're going to get yourself killed this time for real," he cursed out loud. His next call was to Grissom to fill him in on what was going on.

Greg got to Eula Lane and did not find anything but a house that had been under construction, but seemed to stop midway, more than likely due to the housing and economic crisis. The house only had the foundation and one wall up. It could not be where the killer kept the victims. It was too open. There were only 3 other homes on the road, each separated by several empty lots between them.

Greg drove down the street. One house had their garage door open. The blue van was not in it. What he did see were a ton of kids toys. He did not think that was the place he was looking for. The next house had most of its lights on. He could see through an open window a family sitting in front of a TV. He kept going until he got to a small house at the end of the street. All of the blinds were pulled shut, but he could tell a light was on in one room. He turned off his headlights and pulled into the driveway.

He grabbed his flashlight and his gun and got out of the car. He pulled his jacket close around him. It was a cold night out. He walked around to the one side of the house and saw a separate door that went into the garage. It had a small window. He turned on his flashlight and looked in. He smiled when he saw a blue Ford Van parked inside next to a regular Toyota Camry. He tried the door and it was locked.

He turned off his flashlight and walked around the house, checking for any unlocked windows or doors. He was genuinely surprised when he found an unlocked window on the other side of the house. It was to a bedroom he discovered when he opened it.

He climbed in as quietly as he could. Luckily he was limber enough to crawl in stealthily. As he stepped into the darkroom he felt his nerves really kick in. A voice deep inside him told him this was a bad idea and he should wait until Nick got there. But a stronger voice told him he needed to get this guy for Marie. Maybe she would not haunt his dreams then.

He stood still listening for noise. He heard some muffled sort of scream not too far away. He remembered the one room had a light coming from the window. He figured that would have been the room right off the entranceway. Once his eyes adjusted to the darkness, he noticed the room he was in seemed to be used for storage. He saw several boxes piled up against the one wall. He would look at those later after he found this guy.

As he neared the room entrance he heard the muffled scream again and then he heard a sinister sounding laugh.

He realized he still had a live victim with him. Greg had to save her before she was killed too. He walked into a hallway, his gun drawn in front of him. He saw a door further down with a light coming from under it. He edged closer and then heard a voice.

"Soon my dear I will have my way with you one more time, but first I'm thirsty. I'll be back."

Greg suddenly heard a key being put into a door and an unlocking sound. His heartbeat faster as he pointed his gun towards the light that suddenly flooded the hallway. Then he saw a large shadow come into the light. "See you in a bit, doll." And then the man stepped into the hallway, not seeing Greg who stood only about five feet away.

"Freeze," Greg yelled out at the taller man. Greg watched as the man seemed to do what he said. "LVPD, put your hands up," Greg yelled in an unsteady voice.

The man slowly started to raise his hands. Greg was feeling more confident now. "You are under arrest for the murder of three women."

The man just about had his hands all the way up when he suddenly moved quickly, charging at Greg.

Greg was taken by surprise as the man tackled him to the ground. The gun fell out of Greg's hand. The man threw a punch at Greg, disorienting him long enough for the murderer to reach for his gun. Greg suddenly realized that he had gone for his gun. He elbowed the larger man in the stomach, causing the murderer to struggle with the gun. Greg managed to grab the wrist that held the gun.

Both men used both hands and fought over the gun, the killer being the stronger one, managed to bring it closer to his chest.

Greg, still trapped under the heavier man had to get the leg up in this battle before he was done for. He brought his knee up into the guy's groin just as the gun went off.

The killer fell back with a groan. Greg panted as he grabbed the gun that had fallen again. He ached as he managed to stand up, pointing his gun again at the killer.

"That won't happen again. Backup is on its way," Greg told him as he found it painful to breathe.

The murderer looked at Greg and could see his face better now that they were more in the light. "I know you. The last girl, she had a photo of you in her wallet. You're her boyfriend aren't you? You aren't a cop," he chuckled suddenly.

"I work for the LVPD, I'm not lying," Greg said through gritted teeth.

"Sure you do. You are just her sorry-ass boyfriend. God, she cried your name out when she was begging to be saved. What was that name she cried out? A hero that came too late," he sneered.

"Shut up," Greg seethed. He did not want to hear how her final moments were from her killer.

"Greg, that was it. 'Greg, where are you?' she would cry and then I would tell her you did not care enough. Then I would whip her," he jeered.

"Stop talking about her," Greg warned. He felt ice building in his veins the more he spoke of her.

"She was such a sweet thing too to be inside, mmmm," the man leered at him, an evil grin plastered on his face.

"Greg, it's Nick. I'm here now. You can put down your gun," a voice suddenly came from behind him.

Nick had broken speed limits to get to where Greg was. He did not want to lose his friend to this crazy killer. He had driven down the street until he saw Greg's car in one driveway. He too saw the van in the garage. He then saw the open window and heard the raised voices. He climbed through and followed the voices. He heard the man taunting Greg. He also heard the strangeness in Greg's voice when he told the other man to stop talking. It almost did not sound like him.

He now stood behind Greg, with his own gun drawn on the man who sat up against the wall. He was dressed in all black. His hair was brown and unkempt looking. He had cold grey eyes that told of the kind of man he was.

Greg hardly flinched when he heard Nick behind him. His focus was completely on the person who his gun was aimed on.

"Aww, look a real cop is here now. You got me after all, but you were still too late to save your little girlfriend. You should have heard her beg for me to stop fucking her. I rode her hard, harder than you could ever manage I bet, Greggy," the killer smiled smugly.

"Don't say another word about her," Greg said in a strangled voice as his hands began to shake.

"Greg, give me your gun. You are not trained for something like this." Nick told him as he stepped closed to him.

"After I fucked her brains out she begged for that knife in her heart when she realized you were not coming to save her. And then her scream when…" A bullet shot suddenly rang out, followed by two more in a row.

"Greg!" Nick cried out as he watched blood begin to pool around the killer's body.

Greg's whole body shook but his arms were still outstretched holding the gun but no longer firing. Nick stood shocked for a moment before finally placing his hand over the top of Greg's gun. Greg let go of his death grip on the gun. Nick quickly took it from him. Greg just stood there, his whole body shaking.

Nick went over to the killer and checked for a pulse. He had none. Then he heard a muffled scream. He looked at Greg, who was still standing in the shadow before stepping back to where he heard the scream. He looked into the lit doorway to see a set of stairs. He went down and found their missing girl, still alive but beaten and naked. He quickly untied her hands and took the gag out of her mouth. She was sobbing hysterically.

"You're safe now. I'm Nick Stokes of the LVPD Crime lab. Shhh." He got on his cell phone and told them exactly where he was and called for an ambulance. He carried the girl upstairs and saw Greg leaning against the wall now.

Nick walked the other way, finding a couch to let the girl lay on. He found a blanket and covered her with it.

"Kate, you're going to be okay now. He's dead. An ambulance will be here soon," he told the still sobbing woman. She nodded her head in understanding. "I'll be right back. You're safe now. Okay?" She nodded again and clutched his hand gratefully before he walked away.

He went back to see how Greg was doing. He walked into the hallway and saw Greg on the ground now, clutching his side. He looked pale as a ghost but his eyes were blank. He knew the killer had driven him to the breaking point. He knelt down next to Greg and suddenly realized there was blood on his hand that was clutching his side. "Greg? What's wrong?" When he did not respond to his question and he noticed that his eyes were beginning to close, he moved his bloodied hand away. He gasped. "You've been shot! When did that happen?" He had a bullet wound in his lower right side. His jacket hid the bleeding when he was standing.

Nick quickly reapplied pressure to the wound. "Greg, talk to me!"

But Greg was lost to the world right now. He checked out the moment he fired his gun. He hardly even felt the pain. He was waiting to be taken away so he could see his Marie again.

Nick could see in his eyes that Greg was already halfway gone. "Damn it! Where are the medics?"

Finally he heard sirens in the distance. "Hold on, Greggo. You're not checking out of this world yet."

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Thanks for reading! Please review!


	9. Chapter 9

_A/N-Thanks for the really nice reviews. I am glad you all have liked how dealt with Greg's emotions. I only have a few chapters left now. Hope you all continue to enjoy!_

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Grissom came in with Catherine and Brass into house. Catherine went to Kate Hall right away.

"We're in the hallway. We need paramedics," Nick yelled out to them.

Brass stopped at the dead man lying on the ground in a pool of blood. Grissom walked over to where Nick sat with Greg. "What happened here?"

Nick was not sure if he should be truthful about Greg shooting an unarmed man or tell him it was self-defense. Given his own bullet wound, self-defense seemed reasonable but the suspect had no gun from what he could tell. Nick would have to spin a good story.

"When I got here, Greg was holding the gun on the suspect. The suspect was taunting Greg about Marie. I'm not sure how he knew about him being her boyfriend but he was describing what he did to her."

"Greg had a gun? Who's is it?" Grissom asked him.

"Greg's. He purchased it a few days ago he said. He said he has a permit for it," Nick told him. He prayed he did have the permit.

"Hmm, I know he mentioned getting a gun but I did not think he would go through with it. Sorry, go on with what you witnessed," Grissom said.

This was where Nick planned on changing the story some. "Well suddenly the guy lunged towards Greg and he fired until he was down. I did not realize Greg was shot until after I found the girl. Maybe they struggled for the gun before or the guy's gun is somewhere in the house," Nick told him. The paramedics came into help Greg. Nick and Grissom moved aside.

"Is he going to be okay?" Nick asked as they began to put him on a stretcher.

"He's lost a lot of blood and seems to be in shock. As long as the bullet did not hit any major organs he should be okay, we've got to move though," the female medic told him.

As they wheeled Greg out, Nick asked Grissom if he could follow to the hospital. "I'm sorry Nick, I need you here to help explain things. Catherine will go to the hospital for the victim and for Greg. Once we are done here you can go."

They met up with Catherine in the living room. "How is he?" She asked with concern after seeing him wheeled out.

"They say he's lost a lot of blood. Gosh, I had no idea he was even shot at first," Nick said, full of guilt suddenly.

"He'll be okay, Nicky. If he made it through the torture and drugs from Robin Weaver, he will make it through this," Catherine reassured him.

"Yeah, well I hope so. It's just not fair what he's had to deal with," Nick sighed.

"That's for sure," Catherine agreed. "I'm going to go with Kate now to the hospital. Once I am done with her I will check on Greg and let you know."

"Thanks Catherine," Grissom said to her before she left.

Once she was gone Grissom, Nick and Brass started going through the house to find the identity of this man. They split up.

Nick took the small basement where the girl was. He had gotten his kit out of his SUV and was taking pictures. The basement was fairly empty, except for a bindle of rope, a hook where a wide, bloodied belt was hung on, and a chair. He thought it reminded him a lot of where Greg had been held and was glad Greg did not see it.

He swabbed seamen and blood that was on the ground. He bagged the belt and the rope. It was a little while longer before he went back upstairs to see Grissom and Brass.

"Apparently our killer is Cory Ricoh. He was renting this house, just moved in a little over a month ago. Owner said he told him he just moved here for a new job, said he worked as a nurse. That would explain his access to the drugs. Vega is doing a deeper background check on him," Brass told them.

"Well, we'll have to bring these boxes in this other bedroom back with us. Seems he kept some of his victim's stuff, like their clothes in these boxes. I also found our liquid latex in his bedroom dresser drawer," Grissom told him.

"Guy seemed pretty confident about not getting caught. Even though Greg went on his own with his idea and lead, it turned out to be the best thing since we stopped him now," Nick said.

"Yes but when Greg is better he will have some explaining to do," Grissom said firmly. He was more concerned that Greg had put his own life in danger than anything. He knew Greg's mind was not as reasonable as it was prior to his abduction. The large doses over a short period of time of the Scopolamine had done some damage along with just the torture he endured. Greg's doctor had confirmed that. His migraines had been another affect of the drugs and torture.

"Yeah, well don't be too hard on the kid, he's been through hell." Nick was shocked that this comment came from Brass.

"I know, trust me," Grissom said as he gave Nick a knowing glance. The secret of his suicide attempt still remained oblivious to Brass.

"Well, let's finish going through the rest of this place. Transport is coming out to get the van," Grissom said.

"Yeah the faster we are working here, the quicker we can check on Greg's condition," Nick said. He wanted to be there when Greg woke up. He hoped to be able to talk to him first.

Back at the hospital, Catherine was giving the SAE kit from Kate Hall to a uniform to take back to the lab. She went to the nurses' station and asked if there was any news on Greg's condition. They told her he was still in surgery. She sighed and decided to go back and see if Kate was ready to talk yet.

She walked into the long-haired brunette's room. Her face was bruised and puffy. She opened her eyes as she heard the door open. Catherine could see the initial fright in her eyes before she relaxed a little.

"Hi Kate. I was hoping we could talk some. Are you feeling up to it?" She asked her as she approached her bedside.

Kate sighed and then said, "I guess so. He is dead now, for real, right?" She asked first.

"Yes, he is dead. He can't hurt you anymore. Now is it okay if I record our conversation? Saves you from having to repeat it again," Catherine said.

"Yeah, I guess." She shivered slightly.

"Okay, Kate can you tell me how he grabbed you?"

She shook her head. "I was so stupid. He came to my door saying he was sent by apartment management to clean my carpets. I told him I did not know about it. He said he would be quick. He was carrying some kind of case and a steam cleaner. My carpet was dirty, so I let him in. I mean he looked harmless enough overall. He set down his kit and said he had to get the chemicals out for his steam cleaner. I let him do his thing and stepped away into the kitchen. A couple moments later I hear his voice right behind me and I turn around to see him with a needle in his hand. He jabbed it into my neck. I tried to scream but he covered my mouth. A minute later I feel all weird and numb and eventually I blacked out. Next thing I remember was waking up, tied with my hands behind my back and completely naked." She shuddered and grabbed the water next to her and took a sip and then continued on.

"I realized I was in some basement because I was on a cement floor and I saw a stairway with a door at the top. I looked around and the room creeped me out. I heard about those other girls on the news and I suddenly realized I must be his next victim. I started to get up to try going up the stairs when the door opened and I saw him again. This time he looked much more scary. He grabbed my arm and led me back down the stairs. He pushed me face first against the wall. I saw him reach over and grab this belt from a hook. Then he started beating me with it, saying 'bad girls who try to escape get punished. You're a bad girl.'" She started sobbing.

"I'm sorry, Kate. I know this is hard," Catherine said sympathetically.

"I'm just glad I'm still alive. When I heard that other voice upstairs, I never felt so thrilled. I could tell it was a cop. I heard him yell 'freeze'. But then I heard what sounded like a struggle and a gunshot. I though he was dead, but then I heard his voice and the cop's voice again. Then I finally heard more gun shots and then he came down, Nick, is that his name?" She asked.

"Yes, Nick came to get you but it was actually Greg who I believe you heard. He was there first. He was shot though. So he's in surgery right now." Catherine wanted her to know who the true hero was.

"Oh, is he going to be okay?"

"I hope so. He is a good friend and co-worker." Catherine finished up her questioning of Kate and then headed out into the waiting room for word on Greg.

About fifteen minutes later a surgeon came out. "Are you here for Greg Sanders?"

She stood up. "Yes, is he okay?" She asked with worry.

"He lost a lot of blood and had a collapsed lung but we were able to take care of both. He should make a full recovery. The bullet did not hit any major organs." He pulled a small plastic bag out of his pocket. "Here is the bullet. He will be able to have visitors once he is set up in a room in ICU."

She took the bag from him and then thanked him. She got out her phone to call the others and let them know that he was going to be okay.

Nick opened the door and looked in on his pale friend lying in the bed, with IV's and a chest tube. He came in and sat down in the empty chair next to the bed.

He wondered at how Greg's expression looked serene almost, like he finally found some peace again. "You know, you've spent far too much time in hospital beds. You really need to stop ending up here," Nick said to him, even though he knew he was unconscious.

He had been out of surgery for a few hours now. Nick came once they turned in all the evidence they had from Cory Ricoh's house. Catherine left to go home to her daughter. She told Nick to give Greg her love when he woke up.

Nick cracked open a book he brought with him to keep him busy. He wanted to be the first one Greg spoke with to make sure he was okay with his story.

_He stood in the middle of the desert alone when suddenly she appeared. She wore the white gown but there was no blood on it. She came towards him, her hair blowing in the cool dry air. She stopped just a few feet from him._

_"I'm still dead, you know. You may have caught him but you didn't save me,' she said with her sad eyes._

_"I'm sorry. I know I failed you. I said I would protect you," Greg said to her. He was afraid to step closer to her. There was something not right with her._

_Her eyes did not look normal. "You are right you did fail me. But worse you became like him." _

_Greg shook his head. "No, I am not like him at all. You can't think that!"_

_"You killed him. You sought vengeance. You are just like me." Suddenly she morphed into Robin Weaver, his torturer._

_He started backing away. "No, I'm nothing like you." _

_"Yes you are! You are a monster like me!"_

_He struggled to run away but was finding she came quicker then he could retreat._

Nick noticed that Greg's peaceful look on his face became more distorted and that he seemed to be waking up. "Hey Greggo, do you hear me?"

Greg's eyes opened slowly. He looked straight ahead.

"Greg, it's me, Nick," he said as he saw his eyes open. Greg turned his head, the scary dream still floating in his head. Upon seeing Nick's smiling face he knew he was no longer in that place. He attempted to move a little and regretted the movement immediately as he winced.

"Hey be careful. You were shot," Nick warned him.

Greg tried to remember what happened. He did not recall being shot. "Wha…what happened?" he asked though his mouth was like cotton and it hurt to breathe.

"You found our killer in his house. You had a gun on you. I was not there from the start," Nick told him.

"So he's in jail now?" He asked, still unable to recall details.

Nick bit his bottom lip. He wanted him to remember on his own but it did not look like that was going to happen. "He's dead, Greg. You shot him." He then saw the realization dawn on his face.

Greg felt nauseous. He killed another man. Why couldn't he remember that? "I don't remember. What happened?"  
Nick sighed. He told Greg what he knew of when he entered the house. He swore he got even paler, if that was possible in his condition. "Look but what the others know is that Cory Ricoh tried coming at you and that is why you shot him."

Greg seemed distant all of the sudden. He looked away from Nick. _"You're a monster like me,"_ echoed in his head. "I'm a monster," he mumbled in a strange sounding voice that worried Nick.

"What? You're not a monster Greg. He shot you, it technically was self-defense," he told him, beginning to think he should have never told him.

"I'm just like her…she was right," he rambled on softly.

Nick at first did not understand what he was talking about but then he realized it. "No, you are not anything like Robin Weaver. Do not even go there. She was a monster. You did nothing wrong."

Greg finally turned to him, his eyes half open but filled with hurt. "She said I was a monster because I could not protect her when I should have."

Nick was beginning to think the pain medication was affecting him. "Why don't you get some sleep, Greg? You're still pretty messed up on drugs. We'll talk about this craziness later."

Greg was tired and he was already halfway falling asleep when Nick told him to get more.

Nick rubbed his face, hoping this event was not going to drag Greg down that dark road again. If he really believed he was a monster and had guilt over killing this murderer, it would lead him down it again.

Dr. Rayon came in about a half hour later. "Hey Nick, has he woken up yet?"

"Yeah, can we talk outside? I do not want to wake him," Nick said to him.

They walked outside his room and sat in the waiting area near by. "What's going on, Nick?"

Nick filled Dr. Rayon in on everything that had happened back at the house and then what he just said in the hospital room

Dr. Rayon felt Nick's own concern. "Well, the pain meds could be causing some of it but knowing his recent history, it does worry me." He thought for a moment. "So you say this killer taunted Greg about what he did to Marie and then he just shot him?"

Nick nodded sadly. "Yeah, I was shocked a bit but then again the guy deserved it."

"Yeah, maybe but this is going to affect him big time. It already is if he somehow thinks he is like Robin Weaver."

"You know he still feels guilty about killing Demetrius James," Nick said to him.

"Yes, I do know and no matter how many times I've told him he should not, he still does. I can see I'm going to have to work with him closely again and keep my eyes open for signs. Say, have his parents been notified?" Dr. Rayon asked.

"Yes, I believe they are on their way. Grissom told them."  
"This has been tough on them too but them being around seems to help him cope a little better. Do you know when Marie's funeral had been scheduled?" the doctor asked him.

"Oh gosh, I nearly forgot. That is in two days. He will be crushed if he can't go," Nick said exasperatedly.

"I think he needs to go. We'll find a way to make sure he can make it, even if he is in a wheelchair and has to come back here after. I'll get with his regular doctor and find out."

"In the meantime, call me when he wakes up again. Just have a nurse page me. I want to be able to talk to him."

"Okay Dr. Rayon. I appreciate what you do for him. See you later on."

Nick went back into Greg's room and took his seat at the bedside. He frowned as he looked at his friend, hoping he could shake his demons away.


	10. Chapter 10

_A/N- Again thank you all for the comments. I also need to thank my Beta **slappywhite** for her assistance. :D  
_

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He woke up but did not open his eyes right away. He felt a dull pain in his chest, making it hurt when he breathed. His mind was still a bit foggy but he knew he was in the hospital by the sounds and his memory. He remembered waking up before and seeing Nick before. He told him he shot and killed the man.

He thought hard. He did remember finding the house now and entering it through the window. He was remembering now; the room full of boxes and the muffled screams down the hall. It was all suddenly clear in his head. The killer tackling him and the struggle, the gun shot. _'That's when I must have been shot,'_ he thought. He hardly even felt it. The adrenaline in his body was running high enough probably to not even realize it. The things he said about Marie; he remembered the hate and anger he felt. He wanted the man to pay for what he did to her, for taking away the woman he loved. He did not remember the actual shooting though. His mind was a blank until waking up in the hospital.

He sighed as he finally opened his eyes. He looked to his side and was surprised to see his parents there. They smiled at him.

"Hello Son, how do you feel?" His father asked him.

"I'm alive," he said dryly. He coughed some from his dry throat and ended up groaning in pain. He saw his parents wince. "Water, please," he managed without coughing.

"Oh sure, sweetie," his mother said quickly as she filled a cup with water and stuck the straw in it for him to sip out of.

"Thanks," he said more clearly after taking some much needed liquid. After setting down the cup, he just looked between his parent's worried faces.

"I'll be okay, they say," he finally responded after a moment of awkward silence.

"Will you? Nick told us what happened earlier," his father said, frowning.

He did not answer right away. He did kill a man who was unarmed at the time just because he was taunting him. "I killed a man. I shot him and he was defenseless," he finally said as he glanced at them.

"That man was a monster. He would have killed you given the chance," his mother told him.

"But I killed him in revenge. Doesn't that make me a monster too?" he asked them as his eyes shined from unshed tears.

"Son, that man killed and raped three women, one being the woman you loved. He tortured them and then killed them. That is a monster. That woman who killed those other men before and then took you, tortured you and almost killed you; she too is a monster. You, my son, are a good man who has had to make tough decisions but those decisions have saved others lives. A young woman is still alive because of your actions and that tourist, who you saved from the beating, is still alive due to you. You are no monster. If anything you are a hero. I know in our eyes you are," his father said to him, brimming with pride.

"He's right, you know." Greg looked over and saw Dr. Rayon walk up to his bed. Greg took a shaky breath and blinked away tears.

"Why don't I feel like one? Why do I feel like I could have done more sooner and maybe Marie would still be alive today?" He looked away from all of them, still feeling deep guilt.

"You're only human, Greg. You could not foresee him picking Marie. Just like you could not see falling into Robin Weaver's trap. You are going to make mistakes. You are going to miss opportunities. You are going to need second and sometimes third chances. That is why life is not easy. It is a game of discovery and learning. I would say you have learned a lot in life and unfortunately a lot of bad things, but it is what makes you who you are. I do not think anyone would call you a bad person," his doctor told him.

"Marie would. She would say I did not keep my promise to her," he mumbled, still keeping his eyes low and his emotions raw.

"Well you did not know her very well then."

He glared at his doctor. "How can you say that? I knew her better than you." He yelled.

"Well obviously you didn't if you think she would be disappointed in you. In herself maybe yes, but you, no. She thought the world of you. I remember when she first told me she had a crush on you. She said you were the kindest, sweetest guy. She loved you and you think she would be mad at you for finding her killer and killing him? No, she would not. She would not blame you for him taking her either. You give yourself too much credit, my friend."

Greg scowled only because his doctor had good points, all which made sense to him. He thought about the dream he had earlier. He was not sure he wanted to share it with his parents too. He sighed and decided to bite the bullet. "I've been having this sort of recurring dream. Marie comes to me and says I did not protect her. In the latest version she calls me a killer and then suddenly it is Robin Weaver instead of her and she says I am just like her."

Dr. Rayon nodded in understanding. Those deep-rooted demons that she had ingrained in him in those days she held him captive still flared up. "With her trial near and then what happened with Marie, you head is playing tricks with you. Did you start taking your Prozac again?"

Greg looked away again, feeling caught. "No, I did not. I've just been so busy."

"Greg, you need them. Why don't you take them?" His mother asked him with concern.

"I know why," Dr. Rayon said to her. "It makes him feel inferior to have to be taking them. We've discussed it before, haven't we?" He asked with his eyes on his patient.

He looked away, feeling a bit ashamed and foolish now. "Sure, everyone gang up on the man in pain here in the hospital bed," he groaned.

Dr. Rayon smiled, hearing his sarcastic tone. He knew they had got through to him. "I'll get you your meds…all of them I mean. I'll be right back."

Greg sneered as the doctor walked out. He looked at his parents who were giving him disapproving glares. They made him feel guilty. "Sorry," he apologized.

"You should be. Why do you disobey your doctor's orders?" His mother scolded him.

He sighed and rubbed a hand over his face. He felt a migraine coming on now. "I don't know why I do what I do anymore. I'm just sick and tired of all this crap happening to me. I just want all of this shit to stop happening. I can't take it anymore." He turned his head away as tears threatened to spill.

"Oh sweetie, we know it's just been a terrible year. I really think when you get out of this hospital you should take some time off and get away. Maybe come back home to California for a while," his mother suggested. She really thought that life in Vegas was just too much for him right now.

"Maybe, I don't know," he replied softly. He turned his head back towards them. "Look I love you two but I'm tired and have a migraine brewing. Can we discuss all this later?' He asked giving them his sad, pleading eyes.

"Okay Son. We'll let you get some sleep. We'll stop by later. We love you, take care." Mr. Sanders leaned over and kissed his son on the forehead. His mother ended up doing the same.

Somehow they made him feel silly and comforted at the same time. "Okay, thanks and see you later on."

He was just falling asleep when Dr. Rayon came back in. "Sorry, I'm just back with your medication. I got pulled aside for a moment. Your parents are gone?"

He took his meds from him and swallowed them down with water. "You happy now?" He asked smugly.

"Yes, I am and you'll be better too if you keep up with your meds," his doctor said, narrowing his eyes at him.

Greg frowned a moment before speaking. "My parents think I need to get away from Vegas for a while. What do you think?"

Dr. Rayon pondered the thought. "It might be a good idea. I supposed they suggested home, huh?"

"Of course."

"Might be a good idea. It's familiar and you are with family."

"And I'll be bored to tears," he groaned.

"Perhaps but it might help. Anyway, I'll let you get back to sleep now." He was walking off when Greg said for him to wait.

"Marie's funeral is two days away and I need to be there," he pleaded.

"I know. I've already talked with Dr. Morrison about it. He is worried that it could jeopardize your recovery." He saw Greg about to protest and held up his hand. "But as long as you go straight there, in a wheelchair and come straight back here, he will allow it. Now, lucky for you or maybe not so lucky, I will be attending her funeral too and will oversee that you follow doctor's orders."

Greg closed his eyes. "As long as I can go. That is all I care about."

"You can. I'll get out of here to let you get some sleep now. Goodnight, Greg."

Greg had been concerned about his shooting the killer that he almost forgot about her funeral. He had just though of it and was glad Dr. Rayon had the foresight to check ahead of time.

"Thanks Doc. Have a good evening," he said as he cracked an eye open to peer at him. He watched him leave and then settled back into his pillow and was asleep in no time.

The next morning he woke up to voices in his room. He cracked open his eyes and saw Nick talking with another man. The other man's back was to him and he did not recognize it.

He cleared his throat some to get their attention. Nick saw that he was awake and said hello. The other man turned around. Greg recognized the face from photos he had seen. He felt very nervous seeing him in person for the first time and felt horrible about the reason he was there.

Nick came over to him first. "How are you feeling today?"

He shrugged. "Still hurts a bit but I guess as well as can be expected." His eyes traveled over to the distinguished looking gentleman who came over standing next to Nick. He extended his hand to Greg.

"Hello Greg. It's sad to finally meet you under such circumstances," the tall, salt and peppered haired man said to him.

Greg took his hand and shook it. "Hello Major Somers. It's still nice to meet you. Marie always spoke so highly of you."

He smiled grimly. "Yes, she was my little girl. I talked fondly of her also."

Nick decided to excuse himself to let the two of them talk in private, promising Greg to return later.

Major Somers sat down in the empty chair by his bed. "So you got shot while trying to take down my daughter's killer, I hear."

Greg blushed a bit, feeling embarrassed somehow around him. "Yeah, I did. I'm not really use to handling a gun. I only got one recently. We are not required to have one in my job. I've never cared for holding one."

He smiled a bit. "You don't need to explain. I'm not judging you. I'm just grateful he is no longer out there to hurt anyone else. I can see why Marie spoke so fondly of you. You have a lot of courage for taking him on, on your own."

He did not feel courageous, he felt anything but that. He felt like he messed up the whole situation. He got shot and then he killed the man before they could even really question him. Pretty much a failure on many levels is what he felt like. He didn't know what to say.

"I just reacted to a situation, that's all," he ended up saying with a shrug.

"I've heard that you tend to under credit yourself. Marie told me you were somewhat modest," the Major said to him.

Greg wanted to get the subject off of him. "Well, she spoke very highly of you too. She said you helped her a lot after your wife died and then after her…rape." As soon as he said it he suddenly recalled Cory Ricoh, the murderer, talking about what he did to her. He felt sick suddenly.

Major Somers saw him blanch all of the sudden. "Are you feeling okay, Greg? You look unwell all of the sudden."

"Yeah, I don't feel so good," he said honestly.

"Do you want me to get a doctor?" Marie's father asked in concern.

Greg shook his head. He didn't want to seem weak in front of this man. "No, I'll be okay. I just have an upset stomach; hospital food." He gave him a weak smile.

"Ah yes, I can understand that. Are you going to be able to go to her funeral tomorrow?"

Greg nodded. "Yes, under doctor's surveillance and then back here right after."

"I'm glad. I was worried you would not be able to make it after I especially scheduled it here mostly due to you and her other friends here."

"I'll be there. I need to be there," he said with a distant look. He needed to know she was going to be in a better place now, where no one could hurt her ever again.

"That had to be hard, seeing her like that," her father said, sympathetically. His expression was very solemn. Greg looked far off. "Yes, it was." He felt tears burning at the back of his eyes as he thought about her.

Major Somers recognized the pain of loosing someone very much loved in Greg's face. "You know, I'm going to let you be. I still have some final arrangements to make before tomorrow plus I need to pack up her place. It won't be easy. I'll see you tomorrow at the service, Greg. Get better."

He looked at him. "Sorry I can't help you pack her place up. I would have otherwise."

"It's okay. I'll see you tomorrow. Take care," Major Somers told him.

"Okay goodbye. Nice meeting you in person," Greg said.

"You too."

A couple of minutes after Marie's father left, Nick came back in. "Hey Greg. Are you still up for another visitor?"

Greg nodded. He watched as Nick came in and took a seat. "How are you feeling?"

"Like I was shot," he replied dryly.

"I guess that is what I get for asking a question like that. Have you remembered what happened?" He asked him, wondering if they could finally really talk about what happened.

Greg looked down at the foot of his bed. "Yes, I sort of do. I remember what he said to me, what he did to her. I wish I didn't."

Nick nodded slowly. "Do you remember how you were feeling at the time? What made you pull the trigger?"

Greg closed his eyes, picturing that moment. "I wanted him to shut up, to stop talking about her like that but he would not stop. I don't know. I just lost it I guess. I can't explain it because I do not really remember actually pulling the trigger, let alone three times." He opened his eyes, which were slightly red and looked at him somberly. "So doesn't that make me a murderer?"

Nick shook his head vehemently. "No! It does not. You've been going through a lot of shit this year. The guy was filth. He was trying to get a rise out of you and it worked. Something in you snapped but I don't think you did it on purpose. You are not a killer."

"How come I feel like one?" He looked away, the guilt eating him up.

"Everyone thinks you shot him in self defense. No one has to know what really happened unless you tell because I won't," Nick told him.

Greg turned his sad and confused eyes back to Nick. "You won't say anything? Why?"

"Because I know you, Greg and I know you would never kill a man in cold blood on purpose. Something broke in you that moment; like when you tried to attack Robin Weaver in the interrogation room. Something in you snapped then too," Nick assured him.

Greg shook his head slowly. "No that just means I'm royally screwed up mentally now."

Nick sighed. He knew this was going to be a long uphill battle for him to get rid of the guilt he felt. He was thankful he was under Dr. Rayon's care. He knew the psychiatrist already was planning on more counseling sessions for Greg. He hated that all of this happened to his friend. He missed the cheerful man that use to crack jokes and always have a smile on his face. He wondered if after all of this that man would ever reappear again.

"Greg, you do have some issues to work through but we are all here to support you. You have your family and us. We will do what we can to make sure you get through all of this. Even if that means altering the truth a little about what really happened," he told him.

Greg looked at him with deep appreciation. "You're a great friend, Nick. I am very fortunate to have all of you guys on my side through all of this. I'll work through this somehow," he said with a weak smile.

"I know you will. You know, I'll let you get some sleep now. You have to get enough rest for tomorrow. I suppose your parents will be taking you."  
Greg nodded. "Yeah and Dr. Rayon."

Nick grimaced for him. "Rough but I think it will go okay. Major Somers seems like a good guy. It'll be hard for him too."

"Yeah. Have a good night at work. See you tomorrow."

Nick patted him on the arm before leaving him alone with his thoughts.

Greg thought of Marie's face the last time he saw her alive. She had looked so beautiful, but then she was always beautiful to him. They were going to move in together. Everything seemed to be going right at the time. He should have known his world was about to fall apart again at the time.

Now he lay in a hospital bed, recovering from a bullet wound he received from the man who killed the woman he loved. His world was just so messed up. Now tomorrow he would say a final goodbye to Marie. He was not sure he was strong enough to get through it.

He closed his eyes; grateful he currently had the pain medication to help him fall asleep.

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_Will Greg be strong enough to get through all this...only one chapter left...._


	11. Chapter 11

_A/N- Well here is the last chapter. I thank all of those who have read this follow up to Devil's Breath. Also want to again thank my Beta slappywhite. My next fic is a Nick/Greg one that I will be posting as soon as I have it all typed up. It is written but not typed. I am starting another new one with a Sara/Greg focus. Again thanks for reading...final thoughts would be lovely too. ;)_

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He looked at the crucifix hanging over the small alter. He had grown up Catholic but couldn't remember the last time he had really gone to mass. Perhaps that was the reason so many bad things had happened to him. But why to Marie? What had she done to deserve death?

"Greg, honey, are you feeling up to this?" He looked over at his mother, who had come to sit down next to him in a pew. "I'll be okay, Mom," he said softly. He appreciated their presence, even though they hardly had a chance to know Marie.

"Okay. Well, I'm going to meet up with your father. He is speaking with Marie's father. We'll be back in a few," she told him. He just nodded his head and gave her a small smile.

He was again briefly left with his thoughts until Dr. Rayon came to him. "How are you holding up?"

Greg stared up at the crucifix again. "Do you think I'm being punished for not practicing my faith anymore? Do you think things would be different if I had prayed some?"

Dr. Rayon was a bit startled but fascinated too by Greg's new thoughts. "You must think you are if you are questioning it. So you are Catholic then?"

Greg looked up at the Doctor from his wheelchair. "Yeah, I guess. I mean I was brought up in the church but have not been since I moved here to Vegas. So what do you think about what I asked?"

Dr. Rayon sat down next to him in the pew. He looked up at the religious figure. "I'm not Catholic but I think we believe in the same God. I don't think it is punishment. I have known people who have gone to church everyday and still had horrible things happen to them. I believe he likes to test people's strengths and weaknesses, in hopes of making them better in the long run. Some are successes, some are failures. Where do you think you would fall?"  
Greg looked sadly at him. "Failure," he said solemnly.

"And I figured you would say that but you are wrong. You are a success. You are still here. You have a big heart, Greg. When you thought you could never love again because of what Robin Weaver did to you, you let Marie into your life. You got over your fears and were able to love. I think in time you will find love again. You feel guilty about killing a murdering devil because you are not like him. You care about life and death. That makes you a good person. You have passed your tests, if you ask me," he told the younger man.

Greg looked thoughtfully at the alter. "Maybe but still why me? Why did I have to go through all of this?"

"Why does anyone suffer? Marie suffered before you even met her. All those others in therapy you've met. All the families of the victims you've had on cases. They have all suffered. You are not alone in this world. There is different kinds of suffering all over the world; people hurting others. Why does all this happen? Perhaps we will never know for sure. But those, like Marie, who pass on, their suffering is over. I am sure she is in a safe, happy place now."

Greg rolled his head back and sighed. "A place I could not provide for her."

"You did the best you could, Greg." The voice was not his doctor's. He turned around and saw Major Somers standing there with his parents.

"Believe me, as much as you try to protect people, someone will always get hurt or killed. I've lost many comrades in war who were trying to protect others. I've lost my wife and now my daughter and there was nothing I could do for either. We can't win every battle, Greg but at least we are trying and winning some others along the way."

Greg felt some comfort in his wise words. "Thanks," he replied softly.

"Come on, the service is going to begin soon," his father said to him. Greg nodded. "I'm ready."

The service was in the small chapel of the massive church. All of his co-workers had come in to support him. The service was short as only her father spoke besides the priest. Greg could not bring himself to say anything; it would have been too hard for him. Plus he did not feel strong enough to go through it.

Her casket had been left at the bottom of the alter for viewings. Her father had her dressed in a dress Greg had said was her favorite. Greg waited for most of the others to leave before he was wheeled up to her casket, with the assistance of his father.

"Can I be left alone with her for awhile, just to say my goodbye?" He asked his parents and his shrink who stood nearby.

"Sure, we can do that," his father said to him.

He waited until they walked away before he rolled himself closer to the casket that held her body. He took a shaky breath before looking in at her. He looked in the open casket and suddenly felt the reality of her death settle in. She looked like a sleeping angel and perhaps that is what she really was now. She wore a white sundress, which suddenly reminded him of the dress she wore in his dreams and nightmares. He wondered if she would just speak to him out of the blue. He shook his head at his silly thought.

"I miss you. I miss you so much it hurts. I never realized how much I loved you until I lost you. I'm just glad I was able to express my love to you in the little time we got to spend together." He looked down at his own hands.

"We should have been able to spend the rest of our lives together. But he took you from me." His voice shook as he spoke. "He won't take away anyone else's loved one anymore. I somehow took care of that, although I'll never know why he took you or the others now. I messed up, again. We'll never have all the answers we wanted because I lost it." He looked at her white, peaceful face again. "But he talked about you and what he did to you. I couldn't control my actions after that point."

Tears sprung to his eyes. "What he did to you…I'm so sorry. I should have been there to save you. You didn't deserve to go through that again. I'm sorry." He gazed down at her. "I suppose you are in a better place now. No one will hurt you ever again, but I wish you were still here for me. Does that make me selfish?"

He wiped the tears from his eyes, ignoring the pain he felt in his chest. He took a painful, shuddering breath. "I love you, Marie. I'll always love you. I'll never forget you. You helped me get through something I never thought I would. You showed me that I could still be loved. I'm not sure I will ever find someone who could accept me like you did but I will always have my wonderful memories of you to keep me trudging through this now dark life, without you. I just hope I can make you proud."

"I'm sure you already do, Greg." He looked around and saw Grissom standing there smiling solemnly at him.

"I thought you all already left," Greg said as he tried to clear his voice.

"I talked with your parents and Dr. Rayon. I told them I wanted you to make a full recovery and no matter how long it took, your job would be waiting for you. I'm sure Marie would want you to keep fighting the good fight in helping catch criminals."

Greg looked back at her ghostly face. "I guess she would." He felt tears threaten again. "I just wish I could have saved her too."

"We can't save everyone but you saved any future victims Cory Ricoh would have had. You saved Kate Hall."

Greg nodded slowly, forgetting about the girl Cory Ricoh had downstairs, about to rape and kill. He stared back at Marie. Grissom decided he said what he needed to. "I'll let you back to your time with her now. I just wanted you to know that before I left. Take good care of yourself, Greg."

"Thanks Grissom." After he was gone he decided it was time to truly say goodbye to her.

"You're not going to be buried here but I promise to come up to Colorado and visit your gave when I can." Tears ran down his cheeks as he tentatively touched her hair. "You'll always be in my heart. You made me happier than I've ever been. I'm going to miss you so much. I love you." He brought his hand to his mouth, as he suddenly could not control his sobbing. All the grief he had been holding onto suddenly poured out of him. His heavy sobs caused him pain but he did not care. It was pain he felt he deserved to feel.

He did not know how long he was there crying before he felt a hand on his shoulder. "I think it's time we take you back to the hospital now, Son." He looked up with red, puffy eyes at his father and nodded.

Dr. Rayon and his mother stood nearby, all watching him carefully. Dr. Rayon could see him grimace with each breath he seemed to take. "Yes, it is time we take him back."  
He remained quiet and solemn on the drive back to the hospital, looking out the window as dusk began to set. His mother sat beside him, glancing over at him every so often to make sure he was okay. He had calmed down so his breathing was not as painful as it had been earlier. Now he was just ready to get to sleep again.

"Your parents said they talked to you about possibly taking time off out of town once you are out of the hospital. I think it would be a very good idea," Dr. Rayon spoke, breaking the silence.

Greg kept his gaze out the window. "I agree," he said softly to the surprise of everyone.

"You would be willing to come home for a while then?" His mother asked cautiously.

He finally turned his head to look at her. "Yes, I would like that. I haven't been home in a few years and I need time away from Vegas to clear my muddled head."

She smiled at him and placed her hand on his thigh. "Well, you are always welcome to come back home. We'll always keep your room for you."

He nodded and smiled meekly. "I know."

"I think it is a good decision. I can recommend a good doctor to be there for you in person, if you want. Or we can keep appointments by phone if you prefer to just deal with me but you are still required to see a psychiatrist for work purposed," Dr. Rayon advised him.

"Can I think about how I want to go about it? I mean I'm not going to be going for a few days yet, obviously," he replied sheepishly.

"Sure that is fine. Just as long as you let me know before you leave town."

"I will," he said as he saw the hospital come into view. He sighed in relief knowing he could rest his weary body soon.

A couple of days later Greg was being released from the hospital. His mother had flown back home to prepare for his stay there, while his father stayed behind to assist him in packing some of his things for his month away. They planned on taking turns driving his car to California so he would have his freedom to get around when he was there.

Greg decided to continue working with Dr. Rayon over the phone or by computer video chat for his sessions while he would be away.

His father drove him to his apartment once he was freed from the hospital. Greg was relaxing on his sofa, watching TV with his dad when a knock came on the door. His dad answered the door for him. It was Nick. He wanted to stop by and see Greg before he left for a month.

Nick came in and saw Greg and smiled. "Hey, how are you feeling?"

Greg looked at him. "I'm feeling better. What's going on at work?"

"Same ole, same ole." He looked at Greg's dad and hoped he would get the hint that he wanted to talk to him alone.

"I'm going to go for a walk for awhile, get some fresh air," Mr. Sanders said, getting Nick's message loud and clear.

Nick smiled appreciatively at him. He took a seat next to Greg once his father was gone. Greg looked at him suspiciously. "Okay, what's going on?"

"Are you sure going away is the best thing to do?" He asked bluntly, getting to the point.

Greg raised his eyebrows. "Why? What do you think will happen? Do you think I'm suicidal again?"

Nick was ashamed to say it but he was. Knowing he just simply pulled the trigger to kill Cory Ricoh, he could just as easily snap and try to take his own life again.

Greg could tell by his silence that he was right. He felt a bit angry. "That's it, isn't it? I really messed up your faith in me, haven't I?"

Nick sighed heavily before speaking. "I'm sorry but I was there when you held that gun to your head and just about killed yourself. And then I was there when you shot Cory Ricoh. I've seen you lose control a few times too many since you were kidnapped."

Greg looked down at his hands in his lap, feeling a bit of shame. "I guess I can see your point."

"It's just that it's hard seeing one of your best friends do things like that. I'm just concerned," he explained further.

Greg turned his gaze to him. "I can understand your concern but not where going away falls into it. I mean I'm staying with my parents. In case you forgot, my mom is a worrywart when it comes to me. I doubt she'll let me near the kitchen knives, worried I might so something. She's probably hiding them as we speak," he said with a bit of a smirk.

Nick chuckled a bit. "Yeah, she probably is." His face became more serious again. "You're really going to be gone for a whole month?"

"Most likely, unless my parents drive me totally insane, yeah a month. I need this though. I've really been thinking about it and I just need time away from Vegas. Too many bad things have happened here to me lately. I just need time to straighten things out in my head and try to convince myself the world is not against me," he said truthfully, with a sheepish look.

"Well, I can understand that, I guess. I'll miss you being around but if it means when you come back you are more like yourself again, well then it is worth it," Nick told him with a smile.

"Thanks Nick. Hopefully this will be the end of my bad luck. Only thing I have to do when I get back is my deposition for Robin Weaver. At least I will not have to see her in person again. The prosecutor said the case is solid even without my testimony."

"That's good that you can just do a deposition and not have to see her again. Well, I wish you the best then in your time away. We'll have to hang out when you get back."

"Sure, it's a deal," he replied with a small smile. Nick talked a bit about a case he was working on before Mr. Sanders came back and Nick decided to leave them.

Two days later, Greg was in the house he grew up in with his parents. It was weird being there after so many years. It was good though. He could not wait to go to the beach for a day to just get away. He only wished he had been able to take Marie to the beach with him. She was gone before he ever had the chance to share so many things that he wanted to with her.

He sat on his bed, hugging his arms around himself wishing he were holding her. Ever since his breakdown at the funeral he had realized her absence more deeply. He spent a lot of time remembering all of the things they did together and how she made him feel like a man again after Robin Weaver had humiliated him.

During his month away, he took time to visit old friends in California and travel around the state a little. It was time well needed away from the insanity of Vegas.

Now that he was back in Las Vegas, he felt the excitement of the city that made him apply for the job in the first place.

He had called Nick and told him he was back in town. Nick invited him over to his place to catch up.

He knocked on his door, dressed casually in jeans and a t-shirt with his jacket. Nick opened up the door. "Hey! You look good. Even a bit of a tan," he smirked. "Come on in." He opened the door fully and allowed him to walk in.

"Surprise!" He heard and then saw several of his co-workers inside Nick's living room. "Welcome back, Greg!" Nick said to him as he patted him on the back.

Greg felt warmth come over him as he saw his co-workers and friends welcoming him back with such enthusiasm. He was actually speechless briefly, just having not expected such a welcome back.

"Wow! I never thought I would see Greg Sanders speechless," laughed Warrick.

Catherine came over to him and have him a hug. "You look well rested, Greg," she said to him as she stepped back from the embrace. He blushed a bit under her motherly gaze.

"I feel well rested," he finally said. "You all definitely surprised me, thanks!"

"It was Nick's idea. He wanted you to know we missed you while you were away," Grissom told him, smiling at him with interest. He wondered if his young CSI would finally be able to get his life back to normal again without incident.

Greg turned to Nick. "Thanks man. It's nice to know I was missed. Any news I should be aware of in my time off?" he asked them. They all took turns talking about their cases and ones still active.

After a few minutes of the focus off of him, Nick asked him how he was doing now. Greg gave an earnest smile. "I'm doing okay. Time away is what I really needed. I had lots of time to think. Met up with some old friends and went to the beach and also did some hiking. It was good."

Grissom smiled at him. "Well we all are glad to hear that. So when do you plan on coming back to work?"

A grin curved on his lips. "Well, I had planned on calling you later tonight and asking when I can start again."

"As soon as I get clearance from your doctor and Ecklie, you are back. I'll be in touch with them this evening and I will let you know when I know," Grissom told him.

"Sounds great. Now I'm hungry. Where's the food?" He chuckled. They laughed along with him and proceeded to start eating the pizza that they had delivered.

Greg stuck around after the others left. Nick was off that evening, so he said he could stick around for a while.

He was happy to be back and the welcome back party really made him feel better. "You really do look good, Greg."

Greg felt his face flush a bit. "Thanks. I do feel good."

"So you've come to terms with everything what has happened?" Nick asked him, still somewhat cautious.

He seemed to think it over for a couple seconds. "Yeah I have. I actually made a trip to Colorado before I came here to visit her grave. It brought real closure seeing her name on that tombstone. I still miss her like hell, but I know I have to move on. I know she would want me to."

"What about killing the guy?"  
Greg sighed as he looked at Nick. "I'm not going to lie and say I'm totally okay about it, but he was a monster and we don't have to cost tax payers more money by keeping him in prison," he said with a bit of a smirk.

"True. Are you still having nightmares regarding everything?"

Greg shrugged. "There are always going to be nightmares, Nick. You of all people should know they never completely go away." He watched as Nick nodded his head slowly in agreement.

"Sorry, I guess you are right there." He looked upon Greg with a certain understanding for a moment before changing the subject. "So are you ready to go back to work and dealing with murderers and crazies again?" He asked with a small smirk.

"Yeah, it still makes me feel worthwhile when I know I've helped put away the crazies," he grinned.

"Speaking of crazies, you're back just in time for Robin Weaver's trail. Are you going to attend?"

Greg shook his head. "Not if I do not need to. I've put that behind me as much as I can. I rather not get involved in it again if I'm not needed. The evidence is solid enough and she basically confessed to a point anyway."

"They are pursuing the death penalty…do you support that?" Nick was curious.

Greg got up and walked over to look out the window. "It does not matter. Last time I saw her, a lifetime in prison would have been bad enough for her. She gave all her victims death to end their suffering. If they gave her the death penalty, they actually might give her what she could never do for herself, end her own pain. In either case, she has suffered and will continue to do so. As long as she does not create new suffering for others, it does not matter to me." He remembered her saying she was sorry the last time he saw her. He did not forgive her then, but now he realized it was not that she really wanted his forgiveness but for herself. She wanted to forgive herself for not ending her own suffering when she had the chance.

"I've forgiven myself for my mistakes. I don't think she ever will for hers." He said out of the silence that had been in the room.

Nick stared at the back of Greg's head, realizing what he was saying. "You're truly going to be okay then," he simply said.

Greg turned around and smiled at him. "Yes, I believe I will be."


End file.
